Category: Motivation

1st Go Around

From ages, 6-25 was a hard stretch for me. But I’m here to let you know and remind you that it doesn’t matter what your past was like or where you came from or what you did or didn’t do. As hard as it is for me to say this and yes, I’m very stubborn and hot-headed sometimes. I think everybody deserves a second chance in life. I say that now because I got one.

Now when you here second chance what do you think it means? Maybe they did or didn’t do something and now they are paying the consequences now for what happened. Well, that’s what I’m doing now. My second chance is not a typical second chance. 

Round 2

With my first chance and go around, yes, I was young and you could say in the first part of my life I was still trying to figure some stuff out. Where I am right now my second chance definitely outweighs my first, there’s no comparison.

My first chance I was struggling to find myself and figuring out who Peter is and what I want to do in my life. What the world needs from me and searching for my purpose and finding direction. I’ll be honest, I’m still trying to figure all of that out even now at 29. But for the first time in my life, I’m happy to say I think I’m getting closer.

Reality Check

I finally feel like I’m moving in the right direction. I got married and published my book. Now, I have published one and have four more in draft mode. I published 120 posts on my website. With all of my posts, I have shared over 120,000 words on my website alone. In my five books, I have probably written around 250,000 words. 

Did you ever think that maybe God wanted you to live a little and see the world and experience life? That’s a concept I didn’t understand for a while. I wanted to know right now, what I was supposed to do and my purpose. Well for all of you impatient people like me, news flash, it doesn’t work like that. It took me a long time to understand that.

I Can’t Help

I have recognized a few things in the last year. First is I don’t deserve any of this. I always saw myself as two different people, the real me and the me on the outside that everyone sees every day. The only problem was the side you saw on the outside wasn’t actually Peter, I was wearing a mask and hiding my true colors and issues and problems.

Life is hard and it takes work, sometimes it sucks and sometimes it’s not fun. But that can’t be the reason why you give up or stop trying. There were so many times I wanted to say screw it, I’ll be a pawn in this game of life and go with the flow. I’ll let other people in the world do amazing things and help people they come across. They don’t need me to do it, what can I even do?

Big Goals, Big opportunities

You have to forget about what you did in your past and what happened. It’s over now and its finally time to move on and get over it. Yes, sometimes it’s easier said than done, I won’t disagree with you on that. But if you want to live, and I mean truly live then it’s time to stop fighting your past and what you did or didn’t do or struggled with and make it up with your present and future. I was always embarrassed about my past. With all of my ups and downs, I was going through and struggling with. In the end, those issues were giving me the life experiences I needed to grow and become the person I was meant to become.

If I would have gotten all A’s and B’s in school I most likely would have gone to college. Now from there who knows what would have happened next. But I can tell you this, most likely I never would have read that book about 2Pac that got me to start journaling and writing in the first place. 

Looking back now with where I came from, where I currently am and where I want to go. I have big goals, just ask my wife or family they will tell you. Helping kids and young adults not go down the wrong path like me is a top priority. I want to help and influence people with my books, my blog or just be a friend to them. I want to create a six-figure income and build my own business one day doing what I now feel I was meant to do. Another goal is to have Lindsay stay home full time and take care of our kids down the road one day like I know she wants to. 

Live It Up

Yes, if you couldn’t follow along those are some big goals I just shared. I’m not going to apologize about those goals because we only have one life to live and one opportunity to live, why not make the most of it and have fun along the way. That’s the kind of mindset we all should have. I want that money so I can put that responsibility on my shoulders and not my wife’s. Yes, she makes more money than me but I don’t really care. What I care about is her not having to stress over it or feel like she has to work more and pick up more hours for us. That’s what bothers me in this situation. 

I challenge you to not run away from new opportunities that come your way. Yes, they might be scary and intimating but that’s all part of the fun. Embrace your mistakes and have fun with it. Don’t be afraid of success and failure roll with it. When you can do that, that my friends is when you start to live. 

Where Are You Going 

When you look at a GPS what do you see? You see the road your own of course and sometimes it might show other scenic stuff. You will see streets and other roads around you. When you’re driving and moving along what is your GPS telling you? Where you need to go, when your next turn is or how far you are from your destination.

Have you ever been on a road and took a wrong turn or missed your turn and depending on if you’re in a good mood or bad you here that horrible word “recalculating” depending on your mood is how you react to that.

Me and The Road 

When I look at my GPS of my life? I see where my starting point is and where my end point is. Now the only difference is that I don’t have a voice telling me where to turn and what to do. On the screen, it’s not telling me in 600 feet turn left, or your destination is on your right. My GPS doesn’t say anything like that.

My GPS only shows my soundings and roads and that’s it. There are no markings to show me what I’m near or names of the streets around me. It’s all blank, I’m guessing trying to figure out what turn I want or where I’m going along my journey in life.

Where Am I Going 

Some people’s GPS might show their end destination and they have clues along the way showing them what they will be doing next. What I mean is if they already have college or a career figured out and plans along those lines. That’s what’s so fascinating about everyone. Everyone’s map is different, but how you use that map and what you did with the map your given is what makes you special.

I had no direction after high school, all I knew was I wasn’t going to college and I always believed I was going to do something different and special one day. That’s the honest truth. 10 years ago, I would have been out of high school for a year with no direction and just beginning to start searching. If I would have seen my future self and what I had accomplished in the next 10-years I would have called bull crap and said it was a lie.

What Changed 

The Peter I know hates reading and writing. That’s impossible, there’s no way that he has read almost 60 books and written five books in 8 of that 10 years and also been married for almost six months? Well, younger self it’s true. I’m still trying to make the most of my journey and the time I lost.

Yes, I did have a starting point when I was born and also have an ending point where my destination will come to a stop. But here’s the thing when I get to my destination that is when my life will end and it’s game over. Even though I might have taken a lot of wrong turns and looking back now, maybe they weren’t wrong turns after all? Maybe they were the turns I was supposed to be taking trying to get me to my destination. I’m glad I climbed those steep hills and made wrong turns or hit dead ends and had to turn around. Those hiccups or struggles I faced is what’s turning me into the person I was meant to become.

More Work To Be Done 

I wouldn’t change anything. I’m not ready to reach my destination yet, I’m only starting to live. Now, in this case, my destination is my career and what my purpose in life is. But my final destination, I’m not ready for that yet and trying to stay as far away from that as possible.

Sometimes in life, we take wrong turns, we get lost and well it sucks and it’s not fun. If we take a wrong turn or get lost, sometimes it takes us to something beautiful that we never expected or would have guessed we would ever see.

Keep Moving Forward   

If you took a wrong turn recently for example. Then embrace it and think about where you are right now? Recognize a couple of things. You’re still alive, you didn’t reach your final destination that’s good. You’re still moving and you’re still trying your best every day and you didn’t give up. That’s very important you can’t give up and just quit. What if you just stopped where you are? But one mile down the road on your left is the Swiss Alps and all you see is miles and miles of mountains and snow with open fields and flowers below?

If your picturing that like I am then that would be a beautiful picture if you ask me. Who wouldn’t want to see that? Imagine if your upset at what happened and you turn into this view. That would be a sweet reward for getting lost and supposedly making a wrong turn, wouldn’t it?

Enjoy The Ride 

With that don’t be too hard on yourself for making a wrong turn or getting lost. Now I can say that now because I lived through it, I’ve been there and I have taken those “wrong turns” many times. But again, I don’t think those were wrong turns that I took.

I want to enjoy myself and have fun why I can. After all, we only get one shot at life, we should live it up and have fun. Have fun and make the most of your life and help people along the way. That should be the goal for us all. Sometimes you need to cut out the noise around you, turn your GPS off and follow your heart. What is it deep, down inside of you that you want to pursue? What do you have a calling to do? Maybe your still searching and that’s ok. I’m 29 and I’m still searching and feel like I have only just begun. 

Stay Away

Ruts are killer and dangerous. They can ruin your life and hurt your goals and potential by doing the same thing dad after day, week after week. If you get caught up doing the same bad habits that aren’t going to help you in the world and help you grow to become a better person then no good can come from it.

I have been in a rut hundreds of times over the years and let me tell you they are not fun. Doing the same thing every day religiously can be very bad. Especially if you’re not in a good place or you’re not happy and feeling good about yourself.

Something New

I’m in a rut right now.  Now don’t get me wrong I’m very happy and blessed. But when I say rut what I’m really referencing is my workouts. I haven’t really been feeling it the last month, month and a half.

I know I need to shake it up, and shake it up I must. Now part of the reason why I haven’t been enjoying my workouts as much as I have in my past. Well, I want to write that’s all I want to do every morning. When I go to the gym after about 30 maybe 45 minutes I look at my watch and think I’ve done enough.

Not Always Bad

Now physically that’s not good because I’ve been slacking with my workouts and not pushing myself as hard as I know I could be and should be pushed. I love being challenged and I love sweating and feeling tired and good after a workout and proud of what I have done the last hour or however long. I haven’t felt that for a long time.

Now a plus with that and a good thing with that is I have been getting a lot more writing done on my books. So, it’s not a complete loss haha. I’m still very productive and always am every day. It’s just on the physical side, I haven’t pushed myself as hard as I should be.

Time for A Change

That’s why I’m starting a challenge tomorrow. It’s my 29th bday today, so I have one more day of freedom haha. I will be doing a challenge called #75Hard.

• Work out twice a day for 45 minutes one workout must be outside
• Drink a gallon of water a day
• No cheat meals
• No alcohol and I like my Merlot
• Read 10 pages a day of a self-improving book
• Progress pic daily

Will it be fun absolutely and I can’t wait. I wanted to start earlier but with my birthday I decided to do it after. Will it suck, probably, I have never done anything like this before. Is it going to be challenging absolutely, but that’s what I need? I need a good change of pace.

Early Bird

I started getting up earlier every morning to read a couple of pages in whatever book I’m reading. Then I work on my book till Lindsay wakes up. It ranges from 45 minutes to an hour in the morning and then I have breakfast and do my devotions. I feel better doing that because I don’t like sleeping in.

Getting up a little earlier helps me to accomplish a couple of things before the day really even starts. I think that’s a positive way to start the day doing a couple of productive things in the morning.

What About You

Are you in a rut? Now a rut could be anything. For me, it happens to be the gym. That’s why I’m happy I found this challenge and it couldn’t have come at a better time for me. I needed something new and I needed to be tested, challenged especially mentally.

If you are in a rut, what is it? Do you know you’re in a rut and just lying to yourself and trying to hide it? That’s not good and will only hurt yourself down the road. For me, I knew I was in a rut for a while I just didn’t know what to do to mix it up.

Now thankfully I heard about this challenge from one of my favorite podcasts. That’s what you need is something to kick your butt to test you and push you. That’s where a lot of people get it wrong nowadays. They see something challenging or hard and just give up and don’t even try, that my friends is sad.

A Much Needed Change

I have dealt with a lot of challenges over the years, realistically I’m sure we all have. Well if you haven’t had any challenges or struggles or any setbacks, then honestly what are you doing with yourself and your life? That’s how you grow and that’s how you find yourself and see what you’re made of.

It took me a long time to realize that. If I want to better myself and challenge myself then I need to do the things I’m not good at. From a young age, I always thought that was a stupid mindset. Well, as I got older I started to pick up and follow that stupid mindset and challenge myself.

Weaknesses to Strengths

Now, look at me. I have been married for almost six months. It’s crazy how fast that’s going already. I’m a published author and working on finishing four more books currently. The goal is to get one if not two hopefully done later this year.

Challenges are what makes you. Your struggles are how you find what you’re capable of. Ruts on the other hand that’s what kills you and your dreams and goals. When you start to recognize you’re not happy and doing the same thing over and over. Take a step back and look at what you’re doing.

If you’re in a rut then change it right away. If you don’t then you will be holding yourself from your potential growth and preventing yourself from getting to where you were ultimately supposed to be. That is a big loss and a big mistake. That my friends is a wasted life.

It Will Happen

Just being me is a line from one of my favorite artists NF. I’d rather die than let this dream go to waste. You can tell that I ain’t playin’ by the look up on my face.

Whenever I hear this line, I always think back to when I told Lindsay for the first time what I wanted to do with my writing. I didn’t know it at the time but a couple of weeks later she told me what she thought. She knew how serious I was with the look on my face when I was telling her about my books and what I want to do.

Roll With It

From a young age, I wanted to make a difference and I always thought and believed that I would do something special and unique. The only problem was I didn’t know what that was haha. I knew with my disability that I saw the world differently than most. I knew my views and outlook towards the world are not like others and that’s ok. Well, now its ok at 28 saying that. I didn’t like it when I was younger.

Now just like NF said I’m Just Being Me and I’m ok with that. I’m different than most, I have a unique story compared to most. Now do I have days I get upset or mad when I don’t know what a word means or how to spell a certain word for example. Yes, I do, it sucks and I hate that moment that I’m in when I have to ask my wife or someone around me. It’s embarrassing, but this is just who I am and one of the issues I have to deal with and battle every day.

Embrace It

I’m not proud of that part with my disability but I guess in order to take the good you have to take the bad sometimes with it. Well, that’s my bad. When it comes to school I’m not on the same level as most. I am and will always be four or five grade levels behind everyone if not more.

Yes, that sucks and it’s embarrassing. But what helps me to feel better and make me get over my faults and those embarrassing moments of mine. Is that I’m not putting my weaknesses behind me like I once did when I was younger. I’m now embracing them and using them to help others and make a difference.

Slow Down

I never liked being a burden on others around me like my family or wife for example. I never wanted to be the one to slow somebody down in life. For years I wanted to die and end my life to take away the pain and to help escape from it. Now I realized how wrong that is. I don’t want to escape the pain anymore. I welcome it because I now believe God made me this way for a reason and put everything on me for a reason.

Personally, if you ask me, getting old still kind of freaks me out a little bit. Because time is going so fast. I’ll be 29 in a month. This May will be 11 years from when I graduated. In case you haven’t noticed people, time isn’t slowing down for us.

My True Intentions

I don’t want to be 80 years old or whatever the age and be a burden on my wife or family or hopefully future kids. To me by the time I get to 80 I want to look back and be proud and smile at what I have done and the impact I hopefully have on people. Do I need to be worth a million dollars or more, no, of course not? Do I need to be recognized around the world or the community for what I’m doing no?

The main people that I want to see what I’m trying to do and share from my heart, not my ego. Is my wife, family, and God? Because those are the most important people to me.

I want to make up for the time I lost when I was younger. I want to help the younger kids coming up and going through the fight and the struggles like I was going through a short time ago. I want to help them and be there for them if they need someone to talk to. That’s why I’m still blogging and trying to give you all the material you need.

Checked Off

I want to speak and share my unique story with kids around the world and share with them what I have learned in the last 10 years alone. I want them to know its ok to be different and different is not always a bad thing. Embrace being different and embrace who you are. Besides once you are ok with what you can do and can’t do that’s when life starts to become more fun and more enjoyable.

I dreamed and prayed for years that I would become a published author and get married. In a matter of 76 days, I check off both of those goals at the end of 2018. I was created for something special and it was just my mind telling me and filling me with those lies for years.

My Reason

I now recognized that and that’s what I want to share with YOU. Do I need to sell millions of books no? Do I need the publishing deal and the recognition no? I don’t need the fame or the money to feel like I accomplished something.

The reason how I’m going to know if I’m making a difference in people’s lives and getting through to them. Is if they were scared of something and now pursuing it like I am. They got out of there comfort zone and trying new things now and pursuing new opportunities in life and what’s ahead of them.

Dreamer

If you asked me when I was back in high school or a little younger what a dreamer was. I would have said somebody who has a dream or goal they want to pursue or accomplish in their life. Something big they want to do to feel an achievement or proud of themselves for pursuing something bigger. Now I’m going to tell you why a dream chaser is way better than a dreamer.

Here we are 2019. I’ll be 29 at the end of March. I’ve been married for a couple of months. My new book has been out for over a month, it’s still crazy saying that haha and probably always will be.

Dream Chaser

If you asked me the same question when I was around 21 or 22. I would have told you something completely different than just a couple of years before. I have been writing for over a year, and I know what my dreams are. To get married, which I never thought that would happen. Publish a book and share my story with the world and make a difference by helping people.

Well, first things first. I have been married for a couple of months. This time last year I was single and just starting to talk to Lindsay for the first time. I never pictured where I would be today. Now I’m happily married, one goal and dream done♠ (I couldn’t find a check mark, so a spade it is haha.)

Keep Going

Next publishing a book. What a kid with an LD and dyslexia how can he publish a book? Well if you were thinking that, or you weren’t. Just pretend you were please so I can answer that question. The answer is this guy with the LD and dyslexia. Or another way you can answer it is, so can YOU.

For years I never thought I could accomplish anything with this baggage over me and weighing me down in life. Until I finally realized a couple of years ago, how stupid and wrong that is. Just because I read slow and not good with spelling and grammar and everything else in school. That doesn’t mean I can’t write a book. I could have some awesome book ideas, but I just need help with the editing.

More To Come

Personally, I do feel like I have a lot of good ideas. Also, I think I’m a pretty good writer. By writer, I mean coming up with different ideas and using my imagination. As far as the editing and grammar and punctuation side of it, well let’s just move on, it will be easier haha.

Now, look where we are. I published my first book♠. I have written three other books. I have a couple more books that I know I want to write at some point.  Now I’m just trying to enjoy the ride and take in what I accomplished.

A Little Hard Work

I can finally tell people I’m not just a dreamer anymore like most of the world. Now, this isn’t a shot at them or a negative statement at them it’s just my opinion and an observation. I used to be just a dreamer. Now it’s amazing if you switch some things around and change a little of this and that, look at what can happen? You become what you have been searching for a dream chaser, and now you’re no longer a dreamer.

As much as I prayed and hoped I could publish a book. A small percent of me never thought it would actually happen, as sad as that is. It took a lot longer than I would have liked and I was expecting. But now that I went through it and saw what I battled to get to where I am now holding my book that I brought to life. I know first-hand that with a little hard work, anything is possible.

It’s Possible

A dyslexic kid becoming an author is that possible? A girl taking a chance on a guy who was broken for so long and needed a lot of help and giving him hope is that possible? A guy who hated his life for years. A guy who never thought he could accomplish anything or be successful in life. Can now officially share with the world that he crossed off his top two goals in a three-month span. So, can you?

All you have to do is keep working and keep going. I’m here to tell you that you can do it. Yes, I know as lame as that might sound haha. Ohh sure you can do this or that or whatever it is you want to do. But it’s true, accomplishing these two dreams and goals of mine, has given me more hope and purpose than I ever imagined.

Focused

I found a woman to love me for me no matter what I struggle with or am not good at. I turned a weakness of mine and a lot of stuff I’m not good at or struggle with daily into something positive hoping to make a difference in people’s lives.

Do I have my off days and not feeling up to it or proud of what I’m trying to do? Of course, and most likely I will always have days like that. But in the end what brings me back to reality is what I have in front of me and what I can touch and see in front of me now.

Keep Going

What I saw was hope and purpose. I feel more alive than I ever did. Now if my book, blog or story doesn’t make as big of an impact as I thought it would. Well that will be unfortunate and maybe it wasn’t meant to be, but at least I tried my best and gave it my all. I didn’t just stop and take in what I accomplished and smiled. Yes, I enjoyed it and I’m still enjoying it. But I kept working and I didn’t give up.

Embrace your unique story and share it with the world

Number 1 Goal

If you would have told me back in August 2014 that all I would have to do is work for a total of 298 plus hours to publish my book. I probably would have laughed at you. That is almost 12 and a half days of my life I worked on this book. Who would have thought only 298 hours till the completion of my book and I would become a published author?

I’ve been dreaming of this day for over seven years. Now that it’s finally here it feels surreal and hasn’t really kicked in yet. You have to understand over four years this book has been in the back of my head taunting me for that time. Wondering if I will ever publish it and share it with the world. Thinking sometimes it’s going to be a bust and I won’t sell any copies or help anybody. Thinking I will chalk it up as another failure for Peter.

Between My Ears

Yes, it can be very draining living inside of my mind. I don’t want to be this way, I don’t want to be this negative or this down all of the time. It’s a consistent game I’m playing all of the time. It’s like tennis going back and forth with positive vs negative.

Even if this book would have taken 1,000 hours I wouldn’t have cared. If the average book from start to finish takes a couple of months or 100 hours it doesn’t matter. What matters is I made up my mind on my goal and I was committed to seeing it through till the end no matter what.

In my 28 years of life, I have never been more committed and more focused in my life. August 6th, 2011, I made a commitment that day when I started my first novel. That was the first book in my fiction series. From that day till December 21st, 2018 my main focus was to finish what I had started. Publish my first book.

Determined

I have lived most of my life without goals and motivation and drive in my life, and look where that got me? Yes, do I believe that all played a factor in my life to bring me to this point absolutely. But that doesn’t mean I couldn’t have made that path I was on for over seven years a little easier. Yes, everything happens for a reason. But I believe we have the opportunity to control some of the things that come up in our life and control that outcome.

When I started my first novel seven years ago. I knew it wasn’t going to be easy and it was going to be hard. Especially with how much I struggle with reading and writing I knew it would be challenging. But I didn’t care what the time frame was or how long it took me. I started writing and never looked back.

New Challange

Now I didn’t publish the first book I started but that’s ok. Things change and new things came up for me over that time.  A few years ago, I just switched my focus to my memoir. I felt like sharing my unique story was more important at the time than a fiction series I created.

My book has only been out for about a week so far. There hasn’t been a crazy number of books sold so far. Which is about what I expected. Every day I move forward this business is still all new to me. I’m trying to take in the fact that I finally published my first book, I should be happy. I’m now a published author. But I’m now a business owner and now I have to take care of everything. This is where the real fun begins and my inner Entrepreneur comes out and is ready for a new challenge.

My Objective Changed

Yes, it’s a lot but this is what I signed up for. I’m excited about this and looking forward to pursuing this new career and path I’m on now. Will it be scary yes, it already is haha? People are buying my book and reading about me that’s still an adjustment. I have always been a private person and always kept to myself. Now I went the complete opposite direction and wrote a book about my dyslexic world.

This started out as a journal and sharing my faults and weaknesses with my dyslexia and how much I have struggled over the years. But then as I was writing it transitioned into wanting to help kids and young adults like myself.

I don’t want to sell books for a living. I want to sell my unique life and what I have learned along the way and how I see the world. Now I’m not saying my views are all correct and you have to follow me or you will lose and fail. That’s not it at all obviously.

You Never Know

All I’m trying to share with the world and YOU. I know what it’s like to be confused, feeling alone and searching for meaning in life. I always believed I was different and meant for something special from a young age I just never knew what that was. Now I think I found it. To share my dyslexic story with those that are like me and searching for meaning and purpose.

It took me 298 hours to finish this book. It was worth every minute typing on my computer. When I was writing and bringing this book to life it gave me a purpose in life. It helped me feel alive for the first time in a long time. That’s why my story is so unique.

Who would have thought a dyslexic kid would want to and could read 50 books in almost five years and finished writing three books, published one and now starting his fourth book? That’s why life is so precious. You never know where you might end up in the world. Never stop fighting and never give up on your dream and passion.

My Ghosts

Imagine the day when you’re on your deathbed. I know that’s not something we try and think about or people taught us to think about regularly haha. You’re on your bed nobody else around except your ghosts.

Now, these ghosts represent everything you didn’t accomplish in your life you had wanted to or talked about doing in your days leading up to this moment. For me, I want to publish at least six books at the moment. I’m going back and forth with some other ideas. I want my fiction series to be turned into movies, which is three of my books. I’m training to do a half ironman this summer just to name a few.

Originally I wanted my books to sell a million copies, yes that’s a big goal to chase. But then my dad challenged me and was being my dad haha. Instead of capping it and trying to sell a million copies of your books. Why not try and reach a million plus people with your books? I didn’t really have to think too long about that, it made sense and I like that more.

Wake Up Call

All of these goals I talked about that has to do with my books. It’s not about the money, yes is their money in that business and money to be made. Of course, there is a lot of money out there and plenty to go around. That’s not what drives me and brought me onto this path of becoming an author and sharing my story. Yes, do I want to sell a lot of copies, of course, I won’t deny that or apologize about that. Because if I sell a lot of my books, especially my memoir then that means the more of that book I sell the more young adults I can be connecting with.

All of this I believe was put on my heart for a reason. It would just be a waste if I don’t follow through with it or do anything about it now. Will it be easy of course not, it’s already been over seven years. In that time, I’ve written three books and started my own blog. In that time, I have reached out to almost 300 agents to represent me. I had 100 tell me they weren’t interested, and 170 not respond. Was I upset and pissed, well yes, I was. Because it was a reality check this was going to be a lot harder than I anticipated.

I’m Almost Done

Did that stop me from working and trying to get better with my writing absolutely not? Did I have my off days and days I didn’t want to write absolutely? But here we are I’m still writing and not slowing down. Yes, I have earthly goals of mine about writing and publishing my books and trying to help as many kids and young adults as possible. That will always be the backbone to what I’m trying to do.

In the end, if my books get published awesome that will be a dream come true. I know for a fact when I hold my first book looking at it with my own eyes and see the words I wrote and Peter A. Harrower on the spine I know I will tear up a little. I won’t even hide it or deny it, I will cry because I know what it took to create that book and the time and effort over the last seven years writing three books. My memoir book alone I have put over 270 hours into and I’m still not done. I’m getting goosebumps thinking about that moment as I write this.

What Really Matters

In all honesty, if my books don’t do as well as I had hoped. I try not to think that way and already looking at the outcome, but this is just an example. Whether they do amazing or don’t do anything I’m still going to be the same Peter I was when I first started writing those books. I know for a fact that will never change me. Because I don’t want to be remembered for my books. Yes, I want to use that as a stepping stone to help impact kids that were upset and confused like me. But more importunately I want to be a light and a good example to those kids and young adults that need it.

I want to be the best husband and one-day father, son, brother, uncle, and friend that I can be. Will I mess up some days absolutely will I screw up sometimes of course. But will I get it right some days, yes, I will? Will the people close to me know my heart and know that I’m trying my best, yes, they will? I don’t need money or fame to tell me I accomplished amazing things. I just need people around me to have an opportunity to be kind to them to laugh with them and have fun with them and be there friend.

My Possibilities

Do my goals and dreams drive me yes, they do? Does one day becoming a father push me to work harder and save more money and give them the life they deserve yes it does? In the end, I don’t need to have this story from Les Brown be my ultimate goal for me. Yes, it’s a great reminder and a great eye-opener and it definitely woke me up.

I feel like I’m already on the path to doing everything that I talked about doing. I haven’t given up yet, I’m still fighting every day and still working hard. I’m just starting to recognize now that I can work harder and do better. So that’s what I’m focusing on now. I’m more aware of what I can do and capable of doing now, then what I’m not capable of doing. My mindset has shifted to the possibilities that I can accomplish not to what I’m not able to do.

Check out the video below

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ddyXrYaN-4 

The Question

I have to ask you, how do you see the world? The question itself is easy to ask as the words roll off your tongue. But the meaning behind those six words is far greater then you can imagine.

How I see the world from 1996-2014 was sheltered and not how I see the world now. Yes, there is plenty of beauty in the world and a lot of amazing people and locations in the world. All I could see and focus on was what I was battling and having trouble with. Somedays it felt like there was a brick wall blocking me and preventing me from physically moving forward in life and preventing me from seeing the world.

Two Perspectives

Yes, there are two different ways you can see the world. Good or bad the warmth or the darkness in the world. Now there isn’t a right or wrong answer with this, all though for your sake and everyone’s sake I hope it’s the side I’m thinking of. Honestly, I can’t really blame you if it’s not the good side. Because I was on the dark side for far too many years.

I had this mindset of poor me, why did God put this on my shoulders? Why should I even follow and believe in God if he put this Learning Disability and Dyslexia on me? In the last few years, I came to recognize that in the back of my mind I blamed God for my hard life and what he put on me. I never really said it out loud or with words, but I never really had that great of a relationship with God and only put in the minimum effort with him. Then one day it hit me about a year ago. I wonder if that’s what’s holding me back? Subconsciously I was blaming God for this disability of mine, and that’s what was preventing me from wanting to get to know him better?

Blaming Others

I have come to realize yes, I did do that and yes it was wrong for me to think that. God created me and I needed someone to blame. Why not put it on the person who created me? That seems like the easy way to do it.

Now in the last two years, my perspective has changed. I’m starting to wonder and think maybe God did this for a reason? After all, he doesn’t make mistakes maybe he wants me to do something with this disability and my story. Do I know for sure the answer and exactly what he told me, well no I don’t? But I strongly believe with my whole body and soul I’m meant to share my story and publish my book somehow and someway. I strongly believe I’m supposed to share my story with the world. How else do you think he got a kid who can’t read fast, is horrible at spelling and grammar and did horrible in school to read 45 books in almost five years and written three books in seven years?

New Me

Was that my instinct and choice to all of the sudden want to read more and write. Maybe I knew reading more would help me in life and business and help me grow more. Yes, that’s possible. But then what about the writing? If you ask me it’s a little interesting.

How I see the world is how I act in the world. With opportunity and handling whatever comes up and whatever comes my way by handling it the best way I can. I was blind to the world in front of me back in that time period I told you about earlier. Now I can see the vision I have toward the world and now what I want from it and what I want to take from the world.

Pay It Forward

It’s about time I start living better and sharing that with the world. Hence the reason why I’m writing so much now and reading so much now. I’m trying to make myself better and improve myself so I can pay it forward and give back to the world. It’s not for the fame, I don’t like being the center of attention so that’s out. It’s not about the money, I had almost $10,000 in the bank before I was 21 years old that didn’t make me happy towards the world or change my perspective of it. It just meant I had some money and still sad and upset and depressed with not knowing what or where I’m supposed to go in the world.

Now I want to focus on giving back more and becoming a better person and sharing more with the world. Now I’m grateful to be alive and I don’t want to die or harm myself anymore like I wanted to in my past. I have a beautiful wife now, and amazing friends and my crazy family around me and supporting me. Why would I want to throw that away? Now I want to share that gift with the world, and help people that were like me. Confused, depressed searching for something, anything. Something that was bigger than them or is a part of something that was bigger than them.

Watch this short video by Inky Johnston he explains it much better then I can. Check out Inky’s story and find out more about this amazing and motivating man.

Guess Who’s Back

I’m back people it’s been a little under than two months since I’ve posted something. I needed a short break. I was getting married and then going on my honeymoon I also left my job at the gym. Now I’m back and ready and fully charged to get back into my writing. I have missed this, its been a long time since I wrote here let alone my journal. But I’m excited to share some new posts with all of you down the road.

I got married almost two weeks ago, it’s crazy I’m a married man now. It still hasn’t kicked in yet which I think is kind of weird, but I’m not surprised because there’s been a lot going on the last three weeks. Getting ready for the wedding then the honeymoon and got back a few days ago. Now I’m trying to get back in the swing of things and my daily routine every day. Plus still trying to unpack everything and figure out where all of my stuff is, so that’s been alot of fun.

What A Year

It’s been a great year so far. I started dating Lindsay in the beginning of February of this year. Now a quick eight months later I’m a married man. In that time I went to Europe for the second time for two weeks. Went to Outer Banks twice with my family and hers. Now married with a new house and a new pup. It’s incredible, and I’m very excited now because it’s all new, and I’m ready for the next chapter that God has in store for me and excited to see what he has planned for me.

Now I’m not scared or nervous at all for getting married and being a husband. I have been praying for this moment and wishing for it for years now. The moment is finally here, and now I’m on cloud nine. It’s been a fantastic year so far and looking forward to finishing 2018 out strong and with another high of publishing my book.

Home Stretch

I’m so close to finally being done, I know I have been saying that for a while but its true I’m very close now. I’m going through it one more time and making some minor corrections, and then I’ll read it one more time and make sure it’s all good. I have the pictures figured out, and the book cover is done I need to format everything and send it off for the whole book to be formatted professionally. After that, I need to upload it and publish that bad boy, and I’m officially done.

Now after I do that, I’m not done that’s only another step along the way. From there is when the real battle begins, or I guess I should say a new battle begins. Sharing my book with people and getting the word out with what I’m trying to do. Share my story and share with kids what I’m trying to do and let them hear my story first hand from me and they know what I’m trying to do.

The Real Me

I want them to see all of my struggles and failures not just in my book but first hand straight from my mouth. It doesn’t matter if that’s from my book or talking to them in person or however, I’m doing it. I want them to know and share with them that it doesn’t matter what your history WAS in the past and what you were doing. Now is the time to focus on the present and where you WANT to go in your life.

Every day is a gift we are given, some people recognize and know that and some don’t. Next, you should be grateful for waking up in the morning because not everyone will wake up. After you understand that and can fully grasp that, that’s when you need to start working and kicking butt every day. Because who knows if it will be your last day or not.

The Ultimate Gift

Take every day you are given from above as a gift from God because well it is. Make the most of that day in front of you. You have a new day in front of you and don’t focus so much on the past, focus on the present and what’s next.

I’m doing better as the days go on. But I still struggle with getting caught up from some stuff from my past. I’m not perfect. I’ll admit that it’s still a working progress in that category. But I recognize where I’m wrong and working on it trying to get better. I’m always trying to improve in the areas I’m struggling with or know I should be getting better in. I know what I need to do. But the question you should be asking yourself is, do you?