Category: Motivation

Mindset is Key

Whether you think you can or can’t, your right – Henry Ford

In case you didn’t know, I love quotes. There are quotes for everything, for all different moods, happy, sad, and everything in between. So, it doesn’t matter what your going throw, don’t worry there’s a quote for it.

What I love so much about this quote above, is only you can answer it and it’s you vs you. If you’re working on something that’s hard or you don’t like it and you start getting frustrated. Do you still believe you can do it or are you in the cant stage right now?

New Me

In my early years, I was definitely the can’t. Every now and then I might have had a few moments with can. If it had to do with sports there was no question it was can. When it had to do with school, believing in myself and well every other attribute that follows it was an easy cant.

Time has just flown by, there’s no question about it. Now am I happy time has flown by and gone so quick. No, because that means I’m getting older and everything is changing.

Now I will say this like I’ve said before everything happens for a reason. I can’t change that and I wouldn’t have even if I could. My struggles and my hard times in my early years and the first few years in my 20s. All of those years helped make me into the person I am today. I had to go through the hard times, the struggles to find my purpose and find my life.

Things Change

If you asked me on graduation day that moment I heard my name and got that piece of paper that I’ve been chasing for years. Wanting to graduate and get that stupid piece of paper saying I graduated from school I think was my first ever goal I had in my life.

I made that goal at a young age saying I can’t wait to graduate and get my diploma. Once I get that everything will get better and be easier. The moment I got it and looked out in the crowd. I thought two things. First, there is a lot of people here. I don’t ever want this many sets of eyes staring at me ever again. Second, this is what I was pursuing for all of these years. What a waste, just this piece of paper that I can’t remember the last time I looked at it in my parent’s house.

My Priorities

Now here I am 30 years old. Married, two-time published author. The second book I wrote with my girl hit #1 on Amazon’s new releases. WOW, how did I get here? Wait, I’m not supposed to be here, this isn’t my life and what I wanted to do all of these years ago? Your right this isn’t what I wanted to do years ago. But here I am and trying to make the most of it.

It’s not about the money and the glory, it never was and it never will be. It’s very simple what it’s about and what this journey of mine has ALWAYS been about. To make a difference and help people and entertain people and to fulfill my God-given purpose. That’s it. NOTHING else.

Time to Live

Now do I want to provide a good life for Lindsay and my family, well duh, of course. But my writing has never been about getting the recognition or $ for what I write. Now is it nice getting those things, well of course? I need to pay the bills and I love food and need to eat.

Now look at me I have multiple books in the works now and trying to expand this small business of mine into something bigger. Now I’m speaking and chasing those uncomfortable feelings that not only terrified me all of those years ago. The moment I started getting out of my comfort zone, was the moment I started living.

Weakness to Strength

I’m living proof hard work pays off. Now I’m not done yet, I’m just getting started. A few years ago, it felt like I was just getting started and just started to live. This drive and focus and the Can vs can’t is what’s pushing me. Now there’s a lot that’s pushing me and motivating me of course.

But the competitive drive that is in me I now switched it towards my life. There is no can’t anymore, all there is can. Will it be easy of course not? I’m 30 years old and would still probably struggle if I went back to school today, thankfully I don’t have to do that haha. School is one of my biggest weaknesses and struggles to this day. Next is probably believing and having confidence in myself.

Main Goals

That’s why can or can’t is so important. Most of my life I was a can’t person. Look at what I accomplished the first 25 years of my life? Now I’m a can person and look at what I have done in the last five years?

I have three main goals in my life that I’ve dreamed about and been striving for since graduation. Two of them came true at the end of 2018. I got married, never thought I would find someone to love me when I struggle to love myself. 76 days later I published my first book and that was my greatest achievement in my life. I’m still working on that third one.

Can or Can’t

Where is your head right now in life? What does your mindset look like? Are you a can or can’t person? Do you want to get better, or stay the same? There’s a lot of questions you need to ask yourself. But most importantly it’s now what your answers are. It’s how you answer those questions with the belief behind those answers its what’s going to keep you going in life.

(The picture is how many books I have read from 20 years old to now. Remember I hate reading and still read very slow to this day.)

Crazy Week

Well, what can I say I have had some cool new opportunities come up recently. Two of them happened earlier this week. It’s still crazy thinking back to where I was a year or so ago or even before I met Lindsay about two years ago. Now looking where I am now it’s crazy how things have changed.

Now when I say how things have changed most of the time things don’t usually change unless you change or you put in the work to make those changes happen. I think it’s safe to say I have defiantly changed and I have defiantly done the work.

Big Goals

Even to this day, I don’t know why but I still struggle with taking in my accomplishments and what I’ve done. I have published two books in one year. I started my own business and got married.

Some other goals I had. I wanted to publish three books by the time I’m 30. Well, I don’t think I will complete that goal. My fiction book is still taking some time. But I did publish two books and have started or in the works of working on five others. So thats pretty cool. Well four of them are done and in the first draft. Now I’m just in the editing phase and trying to go back and make any changes I need to do.

I have read 95 books in the last seven-plus years. I made the goal five years ago to get to 100 by the time I’m 30. Well, I just finished number 100 a few days ago.

Push Yourself

The reason why I share some of those goals with you is that I want you to know how real and normal I am. Yes, I set big goals for myself because of many reasons. I want to challenge myself and get better and I want to have a great life. I want to push myself to the max and become the man I’m supposed to become. I especially don’t want to look back on my death bed and have regret after regret or the opportunities pop up in the back of my mind and smack me in the face and think I wished I would have done that and or gone and tried that.

Ed Mylett has a quote I don’t know it word for word, but you will get the idea. What pushes him is his future self when he gets to heaven and meets God. Ed says when I die God will go over everything I have done and could have done and should have done. He will tell me the person I could have been and should have been. Ed goes on to say if I don’t recognize that person then I failed. But if I do recognize that person then I did something right and made the most of my opportunities.

When I die I don’t want any regrets. I want to be the best husband, father hopefully one day brother, son, friend and so on. That’s what’s important to me. Of course, I want to make a difference and help people and do the right thing, that should be a given for all of us. Honestly, it starts with yourself. If you don’t figure you out and know what you’re doing then how do you expect to help others?

This Was A First

With that and these new opportunities that have come up recently. First Lindsay and I had the opportunity to go on Good Day PA on abc27 and I got to say that was an interesting experience haha. Did I like it no not really, especially being on tv and all eyes on me? I’m an introvert at heart.

The next day Lindsay and I had the opportunity to go to an elementary school near us and talk to them about our book. We talked to about 60 4th graders and I got to say that was a lot of fun. I wasn’t sure how it would be with talking to kids especially that young. I mean they are kids so we had to keep it fun but I think and I hope we did that. We talked to them about our books and Lindsay read the first chapter to them and we are definitely hoping to do that a lot more in the future.

Time To Grow

With that said Lindsay and I are excited about new opportunities down the road and what’s waiting for us ahead. I can’t wait to see what’s next. I’m excited and anxious to see what God has planned for me and looking forward to it.

Now for you, and me of course. Don’t be afraid of new opportunities that come up in front of you. Yes, you might be a little hesitant about what’s in front of you. Or maybe you will wonder, I can’t do that or why me? How can I do that or I won’t be able to help out. Maybe you don’t think that but I sure do.

If someone asks you to do something special like that, then maybe you should consider and take in that they want your help for a reason. Maybe, you do have something to offer and some way of helping out. You might not think so but someone does.

Embrace and Grow

Don’t be afraid to get out of your comfort zone. Once you do that, that’s when you will start living and will feel alive. Embrace the suck and the nervousness that might be waiting for you and roll with it. Thats all part of life and the journey we’re on.

Once you get over that you might be surprised what’s on the other side of that hill your climbing. If you ask me, I would rather get out of my comfort zone and live a little and be scared. Then to look back forty years from now and see what I could have been or done. If you ask me that scares me more then being nervous or anxious about the new opportunities in front of me.

This was Bella after two days in a row working. I took these pictures 20 minutes after leaving the school and coming home haha.

New Year 2020

Well, it’s a New Year, I can’t believe its 2020 it sounds so weird saying that 2020, it’s 2020, did you know it’s 2020? Sorry just checking to see if you knew it was 2020 yet or not.

I know I haven’t written much lately. I have been a little distracted with some other projects I’m working on I wanted to focus on. It was also the holidays that I wanted to try and take a little time off for that. But don’t worry I’m back now.

My Goals

It’s the new year 2020. I’m guessing you made some new year’s resolutions or some new goals for the year? Yes, I made some new goals of course for the year.

• Run 300 miles (I HATE RUNNING) I’m doing this because I want to be uncomfortable and challenge myself.
• Write two books this year.
• Publish my first fiction book.
• Read an hour a day.
• I want to do a Spartan race or a triathlon, who knows maybe both.
• Have 5 speaking opportunities.

Challenge Accepted

That’s just to name a few goals for you that I had come up with for the new year. Will some be challenging well, of course, they wouldn’t be very good goals if they weren’t challenging. What’s the point of having easy goals, how do you grow from that?

Now, will some goals be a little easier than others, of course? Once I complete those goals I’ll check them off and use that momentum to keep moving toward checking off the other goals.

Use That Momentum

It’s important to come up with a plan and new goals for the year. You want that plan and goals to help you keep moving forward and pushing yourself farther in the new year. You want to use that momentum to help you keep moving in the right direction, forward.

In my past, I never really set many goals or did much at new year’s or really cared for it. If I wasn’t hanging out with my friends or maybe a few new years in the past I would hang out with my one sister and her family and some of their friends. It was fun and I enjoyed hanging out with them of course. But honestly, I would have preferred writing if I’m being honest. I mostly did that sure to get out of the house and have some fun. But I know my mom would have wanted me to get out and live a little also why I can.

I haven’t talked about it that much or maybe I have it’s just been a while. But to me, that was living writing and creating. My writing and process was helping me to move farther along in my future. I still remember dozens of times I could have hung out with my friends but I said no. Maybe I could have put more effort into trying to hang out with some people my age from my past jobs. But I knew in the back of my mind what I was working on was for the future and for my future self and family.

It’s Calling Me

Just like what I’m doing now. I have no problem getting up at 5:15 or 5:30 am to work and read till Lindsay gets up before she has to leave for work. Do I want to get up that early HECK NO, of course not?

Especially now that its winter. Why would I want to get out of my comfortable bed sleeping next to my beautiful wife with my pup keeping my feet warm? That is my life right there in one room, why would I want to leave that.

The reason why I get up that early is because I have had a dream since August of 2011 that I wanted to become a full-time author. News flash in case you didn’t know I’m not full time yet I’m far from full time. Now when I say full time I’m not saying I want to make millions of dollars or anything crazy like that. I mean sure if it happens with my books or speaking that would be amazing and a blessing. To me writing fulltime is not about money. Writing full time means I get to create and entertain people and have an impact and help people. That’s what I want more than money.

New Opportunities

I challenge you this year to push yourself. Who knows if I will make it full time this year or not. Maybe I will but maybe I won’t. It will happen when it happens. But in the meantime, I’m going to keep learning, keep reading and of course, keep writing whenever I can to make this part-time hobby of mine reflect the full-time career that I want it to be.

What will your new year 2020 look like? Are you excited are you nervous about not knowing what’s next? Don’t worry I have no clue what’s next either. It freaks me out sometimes but that’s good. That means I’m alive and still moving and able to feel. But I will tell you this, I’m excited for what’s next and I won’t stop working to see what my future looks like no matter what. Neither can you stop working? Even if you don’t know yet that’s ok.

Never stop working on you and never stop trying to improve and get better. The moment you stop doing that is the moment you start to settle. That’s when you start to fall off and slowly lose that drive and start to die.

Your Obituary

Thinking about my obituary is not fun, or should it be? If you’re at the end of your life and looking back at the last 70 or 80 years of your life what do you want to see? I’m guessing it’s something along the lines of success, accomplishments, family, hard worker things along that? Yes, those would be good, but what else do you want your obituary to say?

For me and what I think about my obituary, honestly, I don’t really care all that much. I only care about what my wife, family and the close people around me think of me. Do I want my life resume to say multiple times published author? Solid millions of books, fiction series turns into movie series. Do I want my writing career to be turned into my fulltime job and a hobby at the same time? Absolutely, that would be a dream come true. I want my wife to not have to worry about having to work overtime so we can make money. I want her right by my side working on this business with me.

Priorities

Getting married, becoming a father and publishing a book were my ultimate goals in life. They are still my top goals and priorities and they always will be. But I have been having this feeling in my gut over the last couple of years. I need to share my story, from what I went through over the years to what I’m doing now. What I did do is probably the craziest thing I ever imagined in my life up to this point at 29. I embraced my biggest weaknesses and imperfections about myself. Now I turned them around and sharing them with you.

I’m nobody special, I’m not a household name, I don’t ever want to be in the spotlight or “famous” I don’t care about that. What I do care about is making the most of the only life I was given. On top of that, a goal I have had for years is to try and make the world a better place than when it was when I was born into it. Now that’s no small goal, and if you have gotten to know me over the last few years I don’t have small goals. I have big goals, that for years it scared me to share them with people. Big goals that when I talk about them it freaks me out and makes me start to think if it’s even possible.

Possibilities

Maybe all of my goals won’t come true? But here’s the thing what if they do come true? I want to publish over 10 books in my life and have my fiction series get turned into movies. I want to sell over a million copies of my books. More importantly, like my dad told me years ago I want to impact a million people or kids and young adults.

I know I won’t be able to write my obituary and say hey Lindsay when I die I want it to say this. No, it doesn’t work like that, at least I don’t think? All I care about is what I do in the meantime leading up until my obituary is printed.

My Struggle

My focus and goal with my books, my blog, and speaking are very simple. I want to entertain and teach people either in person or through my books. If it’s my fiction series I want to entertain people and give them something that will help them escape a bad day or give them something they won’t want to put down. If it’s my memoir just because you think there is something wrong with you doesn’t always mean that it’s true. That might be your opinion but not the reality.

For most of my life, I HATED myself. The only thing I liked was I was athletic and I could make people laugh. For years and years, I thought is this all I’m good for? Then I read a book at 21 and everything started to change. I started writing, and for the first time in a long time, I felt a weight lifted off my shoulders. I could write to myself about myself and I was able to embrace who I am. It wasn’t always easy and I had my bad days but it saved my life.

Still Going

That’s what I want to be remembered for. I don’t care what a stupid newspaper says about me or what’s printed. What matters is what I do why I’m still breathing and able to connect with people.

That’s how we should be looking at this. Not worrying about what the paper says. We should be worrying about what are life says and what we’re doing with it. I have goals and big plans. I’m a goal-oriented person, I need goals and direction and purpose to keep pushing me and to keep me going.

What Will You Do

That’s what I want to share with you now. Don’t focus on what doesn’t matter and what you want to be remembered for or what you want people to remember you by. Just focus on living your life doing the right thing and making a difference why you’re still able to. When it’s all said and done if you go about it the right way that’s all that matters and that’s how people will remember you.

I decided one day I couldn’t be controlled anymore by my Learning Disability and Dyslexia. Now I’m a two-time published author and sharing my unique story with the world and letting them know what it’s like living through my eyes.

You will find your way one day. It took me years and years and I never thought it would happen, but then it did. Sometimes it’s easier said than done. Be patient and never stop working every day. One day it will all make sense. Till that day comes, keep working hard every day and never quit.

First Year of Marriage

I can’t believe I have been married for one year already. Not only that it’s been a busy first year. Lindsay and so many close friends have said we have done so much in the first year of marriage. Me, I think it’s been a great year, don’t get me wrong. But I think the Harrowers are only getting started.

Lindsay and I started talking online on January 26th, 2018. Our first date was February 11th. I popped the question June 9th and we got married on October 6th. I never thought this day would actually happen.

Then we went to Mexico for our honeymoon and it was beautiful. We spent a week in paradise, literally it was the best trip I and Lindsay have ever been on.

Goal #2

Exactly 76 days later after my number one goal in life was checked off. My number two goal in life got a checkmark. I published my first book. I spent over four years writing and working on this book. But really this book has been in the works from age six to 28 when I published it. The World Through My Dyslexic Eyes came to life and is now out there in the world. I’m a published author is this really happening?

My wife is now a published author and I’m a two-time published author. HOLD ON, back up. I’m married and now writing a book with my wife this is crazy and can’t be real? This is how my old self would look at this. So, what a bunch of people have published a book before? I still have this battle to this day and you can ask Lindsay. It’s still a struggle and still a huge dark cloud over me.

Team Effort

Even since I started writing in my early 20s I wanted to write a kid’s book, I just didn’t know what about. I know it’s a very hard and competitive category to write in I just needed the right story. Then I met Lindsay. She always wanted to share her and now my dog’s story. So around April of this year, that story started to come to life. The World Through Bella’s Eye’s is now available.

It’s not just another story that Lindsay and I wrote. This story was written and told by Bella. She tells the story and shares the story through her eyes to you. It’s a story about her journey and what she went through in her past to where she is now and everything she battled within that time. Beating cancer, being abused and left in the woods for three days and much more.

Dream Chaser 

Now my wife is a published author and doing something she never dreamed of doing. Myself, on the other hand, I published two books in less than nine months. If I look to my left where my desk is I can see my book and Bella’s book on the top of my bookcase. Sometimes I look at them and think those are cool covers. Wait those are my books, crap I wrote those. Well, Lindsay helped with Bella’s but you know what I mean.

Then I wonder how did I get here? Just a few short years ago I never thought I would be getting married. Still living in my parent’s house with a dry erase board filled with some goals and dreams. Now those dreams are slowly coming true. I’m at 77 books read and my goal is to get 100 by March 25th. I have published two books and I just need to publish one more to accomplish my two big goals by the time I’m 30.

Hard Work Pay’s Off

It wasn’t easy getting to this point. I never thought I would ever get to this point. Now that I’m here it almost seems to easy. Of course, it wasn’t that easy but looking back and reflecting. Look at what I’m doing, look at what Lindsay is doing? Look at what were both doing together now with are books?

I’m not saying what we’re doing is better than what you are doing. Please understand I’m not bragging and saying we’re better than you. All I’m saying is we’re all on different paths in our lives. There’s nothing wrong with that and that’s ok. All you need to worry about is your path and the journey you’re on. I just never thought this would happen. I always figured it would be a dream.

Perfect Combo

Was it worth all of the years being single and wondering if I will ever get married of course it was worth it? I never dated that much and the saying I would rather have loved and lost than never have loved always seemed so stupid to me. Thinking about it if you didn’t love then you wouldn’t be sad if something happened or you lost your spouse.

On the flip side if you didn’t love in the first place then you will never know what it was like to be so connected to another person’s heart and soul. Lindsay and I have been married for 382 days and we dated for eight months before that. But I swear we have known each other for years.

Don’t Stop Searching

Now I understand that phrase and you know what it’s true. The only reason I never understood that phrase was because I never loved someone and cared about someone before. If you ask me it’s worth the battle and the pain and suffering to find your soul mate. Some days I swear she knows me better than me.

After our first year of marriage, I can now say I would rather have loved and lost than never have loved before. If I never met Lindsay then I wouldn’t be where I am today. More importantly, I wouldn’t have had Lindsay by my side. If you ask me it’s worth it to keep searching and fighting for the one you love. Life is short, enjoy the time you have now because who knows how long till your time runs out.

After the first year of marriage, I’m excited for year two. Love you, babe.

Laziness

Yes, you read the title correct. Shopping cart, it will make sense soon enough. Lately, I have been struggling with this. Now I like to think I’m not a lazy person. Now, do I have my moments I just want to lay on the couch with my girl and dog and watch a movie or some football, of course? I won’t lie that sounds amazing.

For the most part, I don’t like lazy days or its hard for me to not want to keep moving and doing something active or productive. I think one of the main reasons is I work from home. Lindsay is out in the real world and out and about all day when she’s working. Its a completely different story and scenario, so I think that’s the difference between us. Now I’m not saying Lindsay is lazy of course, that’s not what I mean. She works very hard in her job. So somedays she wants to take it easy and just relax. I get that and completely understand.

The Right Thing

The reason why I brought up lazy is this. We live about five minutes away from Walmart. It’s very close and very convenient in case we need something and its also right next to my gym so it’s even easier. I can pick stuff up after working out if I need to. Lately, though I have been seeing it alot and it bothers me. I guess I never really thought about it that much till one day a few months ago I saw the President of 1stPhorm Sal, talk about it.

He talked about doing the small things in life. It doesn’t matter what your title is if you see trash you pick it up. If you see something that doesn’t belong you put it away. Again I’ve been seeing this alot but it never registered. But whenever I go to Walmart or leave. Have you ever noticed a random shopping cart next to polls or in parking spots? It might not be at Walmart but I’m sure it happens all over the place.

Perspective

Well, I think it’s safe to say, ladies and gentlemen. Those people that don’t take those carts back or put them back are really starting to bother me. Now I don’t know their situation maybe they are sick or missing a leg or something I don’t know. I get it, maybe it’s hard or you had a long day whatever the reason. I’m human I’m not heartless I understand.

But really think about it. If your to busy to take the extra couple of steps to take the cart back into the store or to the drop off point that’s probably closer to you then what are you doing wrong in your everyday life? If you’re that lazy that you can’t take the 30 seconds to put the cart back then what else are you skimping on in your life? What are you trying to take the shortcut from in your everyday living thinking it will help you get an edge over someone? In all reality its really hurting you in the long run and your future. It’s also kind of sad if you ask me.

The Easy Way

If you use that shopping cart metaphor for a second and look in your life what are you taking the easy approach to in your life? For me, it’s not making enough sales calls sometimes for my job. I get distracted sometimes working on other documents for clients and doing other stuff when thats something I could be doing at the end of the day. So what I need to do is get better with prioritizing. That goes with juggling everything with my writing career and sales job.

The flexibility I have with working from home makes it so easy to do both or go back and forth if something comes up. It’s not like I’m on the road traveling or don’t have regular access to a computer like I always do.

Listen & Learn

What I’m trying to explain is this. Do you have examples or certain things you do regularly that you know you shouldn’t do or maybe you should be doing? Now it happens I have some and look at the one I just gave you above. Now the next most important question you need to ask yourself is this. What are you doing about it? Are you trying to fix it or just brushing it under a rug and leaving it for later and hiding it from others?

Depending on how you answer those questions and what your actions are shows the kind of person you are and also what kind of work ethic you have. Now here’s the awesome thing, you still have time to fix it and do the right thing. Do you want to get better at your time management or your to-do list? Well, read about the successful people that have been doing that for years. Do the research and learn from others and see what works for them. What works for them might not work for you, but it could lead you to the thing that does.

What Will You Choose

Just because you were doing something in your past doesn’t mean that it controls you and your outcome for the rest of your life. Your past is over and yes you can’t do anything about that. But today is a new day and once you wake up you can decide what you want to do with what’s in front of you today. What is your mindset going to be happy or angry? Are you willing to put the shopping cart back even when you don’t feel like it? Or are you just going to take the easy approach and be average and leave it? The choice is yours and your mindset is what decides that.

Remember whether you think you can or can’t, you’re right.

What Do You Want

Work on yourself is very simple and straightforward. But how come for some, it’s so hard to do and it’s like pulling teeth to work on yourself? Now if you would have asked me when I was younger, working on my weaknesses and trying to get better. I would have been in that pulling teeth category unless it was sports then I might do it. I’m not saying I’m anything great but everything changed, now look at what I’m doing? I’m embracing my weaknesses and faults and my work ethic has changed.

If I hated working on myself and trying to talk about my flaws and weaknesses for most of my life growing up. How did I change, or more importantly what changed and why? Again I’m not saying I’m anything great or anything special I’m just talking out loud and trying to figure it out.

My Reality

I think it all started because I didn’t like myself. Sorry, that’s an understatement I hated myself. I thought I was a loser, not successful, no potential and thought God made a mistake in creating in me. Is this a stretch with what I thought, no this is the honest truth? These thoughts flood through my veins from ages 6-25. Now I’m not saying this for a pity party or for you to feel bad for me. This is what happened and I need to fix it, simple as that. I chose to have this mindset and think this way, now I need to fix it.

When I started writing over eight years ago. I started writing for one thing and one thing only. Writing gave me hope, writing gave me a feeling and purpose that I never felt before doing anything else. From 21 until now all I thought about was writing and becoming an author and doing that full time.

My Vision

What didn’t drive me and push me into the writing world was money and fame? I don’t like being the center of attention and I hate speaking and talking to others because I’m very self-conscious about my flaws and what I struggle with to this day and I don’t think I’m good enough.

Now did I dream and imagine what it would be like to create a career like John Grisham or J.K. Rowling, your absolutely right I did? But it wasn’t for the money and my own pockets. It was because I wanted to entertain others and help others and if money followed and it paid me enough to do this full time then that is an added blessing and bonus if you ask me.

Priorities

I want to entertain people, and I believe I can with my “flaw” of mine. That “flaw” you could say helped put this crazy idea that my dyslexic self could become a published author and go and write books for a living. Well, I have published one and it was the second greatest moment in my life. It was very close but getting married and finding Lindsay will still always be number one in my books, pun intended haha. Then if we’re lucky enough and we have kids one day, then it will go Lindsay, Kids then writing at number three.

I always thought getting married and having kids was going to be way harder for me than publishing a book. I didn’t like myself, I didn’t believe in myself, I hated and resented myself. From a young age, I always believed I was going to do something special, I just didn’t know what.

Real Life

Now my writing is opening up doors I never could have dreamed. For starters this coming year I will be going back to my old high school and working with some kids like me. That alone I can’t even fathom thinking about. Now I’m going to be going back and talking to kids about my story my experience and what I have learned. I feel like it was only yesterday I graduated from high school. Now I’m going back 11 years later as a friend, to try and help kids just like myself. Kids who might be in similar situations like I was at there age.

In about a week, I will be publishing my second book that I co-wrote with my beautiful wife. That’s something I never could have dreamed about, a lot of this I never dreamed about. None of this wouldn’t have happened if I didn’t keep working hard every day. Some days sucked, some days were hard, but others were great days and I’m grateful for all three.

Work Is A Must

I know it’s easy to focus on the bad and the bad sometimes always outweighs the good. Wait, that’s an interesting phrase, that would be a good blog post, ohh wait I did that. Don’t worry, it will be posted soon.

As long as you’re still breathing then you should always work on yourself every day, it should be a priority. Will it always be fun, no it won’t. Will it be hard and uncomfortable, of course? That’s why they call it work, it’s not always going to be fun. But it will make a bigger difference than you ever could have imagined.

Now Is The Time

That’s why I challenge you to always work on yourself. This phrase work on yourself came from Trent Shelton a great guy that I have been following for a while now. Never stop working on yourself. The moment you stop to work on yourself, I believe is the moment you give up on yourself and you don’t care anymore and are checked out.

That my friends is a sad way to go out. Just imagine if you worked a little harder, tried a little harder and gave a little more effort? Just imagine where you could have gone and what you could have done. Now is the time to stop imagining about it and start making it happen.

What Would You Pick

If your life was filled with one thing which would you pick discipline vs regrets? The choice should be obvious, but we all know and you’re smarter than that. The obvious choice doesn’t always happen. It’s discipline vs regrets, what are you going to do?

I’ll be honest now at 29 the last few years I became a very self-motivated person. Do I have my off days absolutely? I still have days that I feel like I didn’t do enough? Do I have days that I think I suck and I didn’t work hard enough and I could have done better, absolutely?

Choices

Here’s the thing, I didn’t just wake up one day and say you know what, I’m going to be more self-disciplined and then you go on and take on the world. Yes, you might say the words and realize you want to better yourself and do better. But it’s not that easy, depending on how old you are. You have probably been living bad for years or you weren’t the most disciplined person in the world.

It takes time people and it takes work, don’t beat yourself up. I know it’s hard. Because I beat myself up and I rip myself apart far too much. I get so mad and feel like a failure. Am I really a failure in life because I didn’t get two things done on my list for the day, no. But that mindset of holding myself to a higher standard is what’s going to help me do better, and be a better person. Will I want to do it, no some days I want to just play video games like the old days and kick my feet up and chill.

Push Yourself

Is inflicting pain on myself why working out fun, yes, it is. I love it! Why would I want an easy workout, why would I just want to coast through it, how does that benefit me by doing easy stuff or the same thing day after day? The answer you’re looking for is it won’t benefit you at all. It will actually hurt you in the long run.

Why and how would it hurt me in the long run, great question thanks for asking? It’s going to hurt you because you’re potentially missing out on your future you that you were destined to become. That’s how it’s going to hurt you. If it’s just you, well then, it’s going to hurt your future self and the person you were meant to become. Say you’re married it will hurt your spouse. If you have kids it’s going to hurt them because they see the effort you put in.

Perspective

This poor mindset has been a battle my whole life. Some days I wanted to quit and not pursue writing anymore. I thought it was going to be too hard to publish my book and become a published author. My negative mindset and lack of confidence in myself almost prevented me from pursuing this dream of mine and turning it into a reality.

Imagine if I quit, what would I be doing. Honestly, I don’t even know and the scares the crap out of me even more than what I’m pursuing right now. I have no idea what I would be doing, who knows if I would even be alive. But I do know, I am alive and still breathing and happier then I have ever been in my life.

Stay Tuned

I’m now pursuing a career that always was a vision and dream in my head. It was a dream I have been looking at on my dry erase board for over five-plus years now. I wanted to be a published author when I started writing in the summer of 2012.

Now here I am at 29 and about a month away from publishing my second book with my wife. It was a project that we have been working on for the last couple of months. I can’t wait for the world to read this story that Lindsay and I have been working very hard on.

Enjoy the Small Wins

Another reason why I know I’m hard on myself or so focused and tunnel vision is because Lindsay tells me and people tell Lindsay how much we have done in the first 10 months of our marriage. She says we have done a lot, friends have said we have done a lot. I feel like we have done well and trying to prevent an argument, I say we have done a decent amount haha.

I think it’s just my mindset, somedays I’m so focused on the end result and kicking butt every day trying to get to the finish line. That I struggle to enjoy the moments when we’re going through them. It takes me some time to catch my breath and look back and think, wow look at what I did or we did together. I know it’s not the best mindset and view, but I’m working on it, sorry babe.

Flaws

I know I have my faults and my weaknesses that I’m still working on. But here’s the thing I’m always going to be working on those and trying to get better every day. The time I die, I’m not going to have any regrets, because I’m working my tail off to fulfill my purpose and what I believe God put me here on earth to do.

Now if I die a year from now, then yes, I’ll have a lot of regrets I would only be 30. But I’m talking about 50 plus years down the road. 50 years might sound like a lot, but it will come faster than you think. In the next 50 years. Do you want to work hard and live a good life? Or play it safe and just live and put your dreams and goals on the side because you’re scared of taking a risk? The answer should be obvious, it’s about time we start building some discipline and take are regrets and turn them into realities.

Times Change

When I saw a graveyard when I was younger, it freaked me out with all of the dead bodies. I’m sure that would have scared a lot of kids or made them uncomfortable.

When I was struggling and in my funk in my early 20’s I was confused, lost and searching. I didn’t know what I was searching for, I was just searching for something, anything better than my reality. I was fascinated with death and curious about it. At the time I felt like I wasn’t even living yet or really doing anything special with my life. I felt like a waste of air and felt useless to the world.

Motivated

A couple of months ago I started to get fascinated with graveyards and death again. But in a different way this time. Not like in the dark way that I once thought of in my early 20’s.

I started thinking about and seeing all of these different tombstones at a graveyard. Now I still don’t want to get old, and I’m not looking forward to it. But unfortunately, that’s one fight that all of us will lose every time and we won’t be able to outrun aging and death when it’s our time.

But what started to push me more and make me think more is graveyards. Think of any graveyard you ever saw in your life. Think of how many people die every day. I’m curious the percentage of those people that were happy by the time they died? Have you ever thought about that? What about the percentage of people that liked their life? Were they pleased with the effort they gave why they were on earth, still breathing until death found them?

Can I Be Successful

I know its kind of dark and weird I get it, haha, but stay with me. For most of my life failure and death scared me. I don’t want to get old I’m not ready to die yet. Now success scared me, I never felt like I did anything great or special with my life. Now I’m an author and chasing down my dreams every day. In the back of my mind, I always wondered what if I become successful and everything changes?

You can look at it two ways. First, I could do nothing and stay where I am and go with the flow. Work hard for my wife but just enough to have a safe life. I don’t push myself or don’t challenge myself because that will be hard. Or second, what if I push myself so freaking hard, that all of these years of being a dream chaser and hunting down my goals. Publish multiple books, reach over a million people have my fiction series turned into movies and so on. What if I worked so hard that my dream job became real and I was making enough that Lindsay could stay home with our future kids?

Now One

Between Lindsay and myself we have two different lives. She knew from a young age what she wanted to do in life. Me, I just was focusing on getting my diploma and being down with school. Lindsay makes good money, but it doesn’t come easy she works her tail off every day and for us. I know I’m lucky for how hard she works and I don’t say it enough, thanks, babe. Me on the other hand, I do ok I guess you could say. But my income could not take care of both of us, I will leave it at that.

What if in a few short years my books take off? My speaking starts to get bigger and my impact on the world by helping young adults and people grows? With that change, what if Lindsay doesn’t have to work as much or any more and can stay home. Who knows maybe work on this business with me and we could do it together. Honestly, that will scare the crap out of me because everything will be on me now. But I welcome that and that’s what I’ve been praying for.

Giving Back

This life is what I have been dreaming about since I was 21. Not the money side, writing, entertaining and helping others and making a difference. If I can make enough money doing what I love and have a great life then that is an added bonus and I’m even more blessed then I deserve if you ask me.

When it’s my time and God calls me home I want to leave multiple things behind. Not money, well maybe some money to help my wife and kids hopefully. That’s not what I want to be remembered for. I want to leave behind a work ethic and the fact that I didn’t settle and I was never content with being average. I chased my fears down and overcame them, I chased down the success I always wanted but was humble and didn’t let it change me.

Start Living

I don’t want to die with any regrets or great ideas buried inside of Peter when I take my last breath. I want to leave everything out on the court or the field, like when I played sports. Looking back, I think I could have tried harder in sports. But I can’t do anything about that now. What I can do though, is make up for the time I have now and that’s ahead of me, and so can you.

Now is the time to start living, not tomorrow or next week. That’s not guaranteed. What is only guaranteed right now is the moment you’re in. Now become a dream chaser like me and make the most of your life why you can. Don’t play it safe knowing the time you die, everyone wonders and is talking about the person you COULD HAVE BEEN. That should terrify you if it doesn’t then something is wrong. If you do it right they will be talking about the person you were and what you did with the time you had.

Scariest Thing 

Have you ever felt the desire to create something? Have you ever felt that burning sensation in your belly, not after you eat something bad or you feel sick? I’m talking about that feeling and sensation that you know deep down inside of you that you want to take this new job, start this new business or take this different path on your journey? Creating something from scratch and starting something brand new can be one of two things. The scariest thing or the most rewarding thing you do. 

Yes, I was terrified and freaked about writing and if it would actually work. I’m not the smartest guy around, I suck at spelling grammar and well everything that has to do with school. I don’t like reading in front of people. I’m very self-conscious about myself. How could I write five books in the last eight years, let alone one? How can I publish a book, who would ever want to read my crazy story?  

Most Rewarding

I’m not an expert I’m still trying to figure all of this out as I live and start a new day every morning. With that mindset of the unknown and scared, I didn’t know what to do. That my friends is exactly why I wrote those books and decided to leave my safe place and my comfort zone. I was tired of not living, holding myself back and being my biggest enemy and toughest opponent. 

Now with this being the scariest thing I have ever done. It quickly transitioned to the most rewarding thing I have ever done in my life. I’ll be honest if you don’t have a type of learning disability you will you never be able to wrap your head around the struggles and issues going through school every day. The embarrassment, the lack of confidence in yourself and all of the other side effects that follow. Now you might have something you struggle with that I know nothing about it, I get that. I’m not going to sit here and say I have it harder than you and my life is harder because most likely it’s not. 

Become A Inventor 

With the side effects, I struggled with daily. Even through those tuff times, I never stopped believing I was meant to create something. Yes, sometimes I had to lie to myself or trick myself into writing and trying to be positive to get my work done when I didn’t want to. But hey, you got to do what you got to do.

In my whole life, I never felt more hunger, passion, and determination until I decided to start writing and wanted to publish a book. I had no idea how to do it, I’m still trying to figure it out and my book has been out for almost five months already. That’s what a lot of people mess up and don’t understand. Just because you don’t know everything or every little detail doesn’t mean you shouldn’t start or you shouldn’t confront that burning desire you have to create or do what you want to do.

My Purpose

That is the exact reason why you need and should want to do what’s burning and filling up inside of you. That burning desire, that’s passion and purpose that’s forming inside of you. Creating my books and writing and putting everything together is by far one of the greatest achievements I have ever had the opportunity to be a part of. 

Now getting married and publishing my book were my top two things in my life I wanted. I never thought I would be good enough to have a Mrs. Harrower by my side. When I was younger as a dyslexic kid, I would have rathered stare at wet paint and watch it dry then open a book or write. I never thought I would be where I am today.

I Feel Alive Again 

Getting married is hands down the best decision and the biggest surprise that ever could have happened for me. I still struggle with this every now and then thinking I’m married and how lucky and blessed I am. But publishing my book and writing my four other books is by far the biggest and best achievement that I also never thought I could accomplish or thought was possible. Lindsay knows how I feel about this and she knows she means the world to me and I would do anything I could for her.

This burning desire that’s been burning inside of me over the last eight years is way bigger than I ever could have imagined. The years, the days and the number of hours I have spent working on my books and trying to bring these books to life have given me more hope and purpose than I ever could have imagined.

Now Is The Time 

That’s why I challenge you to create something from scratch. Don’t be afraid of that burning desire and that hunger and passion that’s forming inside of you. Embrace that passion, hold on to it as tight as you can and never let go. Never let go of your dreams. Do everything you can to become that dream chaser you always envisioned yourself you could be. 

Those dreamers aren’t going anywhere in life, but you are and you can. Don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t do that, or your idea won’t work and it won’t be successful. Maybe it won’t work, maybe it will take longer then you thought. Yes, that will be frustrating and it will suck I get it and have been there. But after working on that dream project and trying to bring your desire out to the world, maybe those failures will take you a different direction you weren’t anticipating. That’s a good thing because if you didn’t take that chance to bring those desires out to the world. If you didn’t take that chance, then who knows where you would be today and what you would be doing?