December 2017 – The World Through My Dyslexic Eyes

Being Dyslexic Can Be A Blessing

A Blessing?

Yes, I know if you read all my earlier posts or even a few random ones, you might be a little confused with this title. I have talked a lot and complained and shared about my issues and faults with being dyslexic and all the side effects I picked up on this journey. With that said and all the side effects, I picked up along the way so far. I wouldn’t change anything looking back at my life. It’s true, being dyslexic can be a blessing.

Some days I still wonder and think about it, I can’t lie. Is it really a blessing being dyslexic and having this burden and cloud over me the rest of my life? Yes, I think about that a lot, maybe a little too much sometimes. How can this be a blessing what good can really come from this anyway?

For starters, my early years were hard, there’s no denying that. I had my issues, and I still have my issues and my low points in life and my off days. Unfortunately, I think that’s going to be a regular thing the rest of my life till it’s my time. Within that time so far and what I have come to realize over the years. Yes, I’m dyslexic and I can’t read fast, I’m horrible at spelling and so on. What matters is what I do with the issues and faults I have in my life.

Issues

With these personal issues and side effects, you could say I picked up along the way. With all of that, and where I am now in my life. Still confused, searching and trying to figure out what my purpose is in life and what’s next for Peter. With all of that said, I still wouldn’t change anything. I believe all of this was meant to happen and all a part of my journey. All my issues and complication’s I had over the years, helped bring me to this point in my life. All of this happened for a reason, and it was all part of my journey.

At this point in my life, what started out as a little confused dyslexic kid, now I’m 27. I have my own website and blogging about my unique journey over the years. The last three years I have read or listened to 40 books. I have big goals on my radar in front of me. I’m almost done with publishing my first book, yes you read that correctly. I’ve written a book about my struggles and life over the years. I’m also working on a three-book fiction series. The first two books are done. I just have one more book to write in that series and then the plan is to get them published, and send them to the big screen and turn them into movies.

Purpose

I want to give back and help kids that felt lost and confused like me. Clearly, I know what it’s like and I know how alone and scared I was through this journey. Kids should not have to go in the direction I went down. It’s ok to ask for help along the way, I didn’t and that’s where I screwed up. I was embarrassed to ask for help, I had received so much in my earlier years. I was ashamed of who I was, and at what little I can do by myself. Could I accomplish something on my own for a change?

With all of that said, that’s why it’s a blessing now looking back. When I was younger, you couldn’t pay me to read a book for fun. It would have to be a large amount, even when I was forced to for school, I still hardly read the material. Maybe you’re wondering if I hated it so much why am I writing so much and reading so many books? It’s because I’m obsessed now, what started out as a hobby, turned into an obsession.

Over the years I battled a lot with depression feeling stupid and alone. Writing as lame as it sounds, saved me. Within that time when I was alone and depressed. Writing and journaling was the only thing I looked forward to in the day. I couldn’t talk to anyone, I was ashamed and embarrassed.

Why Not

August 6, 2011, I decided why not turn all this writing into something? That summer day was my first day this hobby changed for me. From that day till now, writing became an everything to me. It was my happy place, and the one place for the longest time I felt free.

That’s why in the end this was all a blessing for me. I think these struggles were building up inside of me and starting to turn me into the person I was meant to become. Again, this was all part of my journey, and that day was the first day of my freedom. Writing gave me happiness and helped me feel free. It helped me escape from the real world, and I could create anything I wanted.

My Imagination

Having a learning disability made school miserable for me, and it was horrible. What I lacked in school and couldn’t accomplish with my school years, it made me stronger in other fields. I have always had an imagination, and that imagination brought me to this point in my life.

That’s why I wouldn’t change a thing in my life and I owe everything to my LD. I was sick of where I was and I wasn’t going to let my weaknesses get the best of me anymore. It was time to turn something I was horrible at, into a positive. It opened my eyes to what I needed to fix about myself and change. Do you know what you need to fix? Do you have anything you want to change? Now is the time, why you still have the opportunity.

Old Vs New Mindset

Old Mindset

It’s my past vs my future, it’s my old vs new mindset. This is very important people, it’s what is going to help us and drive us to become successful. If your mind isn’t right and you don’t have the right attitude then you’re in trouble. That’s why part of my old ways died a few years back. I had no other choice.

My old mindset was just to exist and just trying to survive and get through another day. Once I did that then I would consider that a win and go on to the next day and start all over. With whatever you’re doing in life or where ever you are in your life. If you’re not thinking straight and trying to stay ahead of the game and working hard every day, you’re going to be in trouble and hurting for a long time. That’s not the best mindset to have in life and live with every day.

New Mindset

We are all different people and have different battles and follow different paths in our life. I sad it before and I’ll say it again, that’s what makes all of so unique and interesting. We are all meant to accomplish and pursue different challenges and experiences in our lives. What we make of those experiences and speed bumps that come up in front of us, and how you get over those difficulties that’s how you find yourself. Are you going to give in and let that issue get the best of you, or are you going to stop making excuses and keep fighting to live another day?

We’re all going different speeds and all are on different paths every day. For me, I was one of those unlucky people that kept getting stopped and blocked on my path. Now I don’t think I ever made any wrong turns. I think this was the life I was always meant to have and to be walking on. Yes, it sucks sometimes, I won’t lie about that. Yes, some days were harder than others and I wanted to give up, I’m sure I’m not the only one to ever want to give up and wanted to wave the white flag.

21 Nothing

After those days and waving that flag I quickly realized I can’t do this, I can’t give up. Thinking back to when I was a kid and visualizing what my future might look like, I would always dream about it and think what I will be doing at 21, 25 even 30 years old. 21, I wasn’t doing anything I was confused and as lost as someone could be. I didn’t know what to do, where to go, I honestly had no idea what was next.

New Me

At 25 I still had no idea or no clue what was next for me and what my future looked like. I realized enough is enough, I wasted far too many years being sad, angry, and miserable. Sure I might have those days every once in awhile, I mean that’s normal we all have our off days

I just came to the conclusion that life doesn’t have to be so bad; life is what you make it. If you want to be pissed off toward the world, well that’s the kind of life you’re going to have. If you want to be happy and try and make the most of whatever situation you are placed in, well then that’s the life you will have. I got sick and tired of the life I was living so it was time for a change. I desperately needed a change, and fast.

My new mindset was created and it was born. I’m ready for the world and I’m ready for whatever comes my way next. Just because my mindset is starting to become a little more clear doesn’t mean life is going to change and be easy at the snap of my fingers. I have to put in the work to match my new mindset. It can’t just be one or the other, its multiple things you have to change and fix.

New Year

Your mindset and attitude is only the first step, and there are multiple steps that come after. Now the steps following after this step might be a little easier, but it still won’t be a breeze and you still have to work. The mindset and getting it clear and focused is the first major step you need to fix.

With the new year coming and around the corner, what do you want to change and fix for 2018? This is a new chapter in your book of life. Now, is the time to start living for once and make the most of the time we have left. Don’t just look at the end goal of; alright I need to accomplish these 10 things or whatever number by December 31st and GO. Yes, you need to have an end goal, I agree with that. Take it one step at a time, one day at a time. You need to set those small goals to help make that path a little easier to reach your ultimate goal and whatever you’re focused on with wanting to accomplish.

Live In The Moment

What do you need to change and fix, not just for the New Year because everyone talks about it? You should want to do it for yourself, and that’s what you need to focus on for the time being. Focus on you and that mindset to get it right and figure out what you want. Then from there use that momentum and use that new mindset to help others and accomplish everything else you want to do this year. Now is the time to start living, don’t get too distracted with what’s on the horizon. Yes, keep your eye on what’s in front of you so you are prepared, but don’t forget to live in the moment.

Fear Is A Great Motivator

Scared

Let’s be honest, not many people like to be scared or think, fear is a great motivator. I agree, most of my life If I feared something or was scared why would I want to confront it or go near it, that’s stupid? Well, what did I know; it turns out nothing I was wrong haha. It’s true; fear is a great motivator and can help push you to new limits that you never expected in life.

Fear can mean anything and its different for every one of us, and that’s perfectly ok. Besides, we are all on different paths and heading in different directions in life. That’s why we can’t get too caught up in other people’s lives and seeing what they are doing and how they are living. You don’t know what they are going through or maybe battling at the moment. Everything might look ok and fine on the outside, but on the inside they are broken and lost like so many of us.

Different Paths

When I was younger I’ll admit I was scared a lot, when it came to school everything terrified me. Having the teacher calling on me to answer a question, or maybe to read something out loud. Don’t get me started on homework and studying for tests. Who knows how many fights I got into with my parents through the years about school-related topics. I can’t read fast, my spelling was a joke, and I can’t write well. When it comes to paying attention in school I’m like a little kid, I can’t stay focused and get distracted very easily.

With all of my faults and issues I have or used as excuses over the years. Even with that deadweight, I used holding me back and preventing me from living all these years. My fear was one of the final pushes I needed to push me over the edge to keep going, and finally, start living for once. That’s why I need to do this blog, that’s why I said enough was enough. I know I’m not the only one that used my dyslexia and lack of knowledge toward school as excuses. I know there are millions of people that maybe had the same thoughts and frustrations just like me. Are we all different and have different hobbies of course, but when it comes to school and the learning side we all are probably very similar.

Leap Of Faith

There were two things that pushed me over the edge. They both help me take that leap of faith to finally start living. I wanted to conquer my fear of my faults and not be ashamed of who I am and all the issues and setbacks I had all these years. Sure my mindset will always need work and hopefully not be so negative and judgmental of myself. That’s going to be a lifelong battle. The second was YOU; I know there are millions of kids just like me.

I know what my childhood was like, now I was beyond blessed and lucky. Having a roof over my head, both of my parents, food, water and everything else I needed. I wasn’t spoiled but my parents provided everything to take care of me and my sisters. What about those kids who don’t have a mom or dad? Maybe a parent or loved one died, or maybe just couldn’t take it anymore and just got up and left one day. I didn’t have to deal with any of that, so that’s why when it comes to me complaining it’s only my mindset and the issues I dealt with. Everything else I have no reason to complain about, I had more than enough.

More Than Enough

I know what you kids are dealing with and battling every day. That’s why people and kids need to hear my story. Now, is my story better than yours ABSOLUTELY not, just like yours is not better than mine. Are stories are just different and we all traveled different paths in our life. I know the outcome and what and where that negative attitude will take you after all of these years, NOWHERE.

I’m 27 now and still searching and trying to find my way and purpose in life. I have two part-time jobs at the moment. Now trying to turn what started out as a hobby that quickly turned into an obsession, into a full-time career. I think my story can do more good than bad. What I mean with that is I have always been a private person; I never really liked opening up to people and talking that much. Being dyslexic made me scared and embarrassed to talk to people. It prevented me from living a normal life like everyone else. I quickly realized I don’t want a normal life like everyone else. I don’t want to fit in with the world like I used to want when I was a kid in school.

No More Hiding

I’m part of a small group that is different and has a unique disability compared to everyone else. Now it’s time to use that to my benefit and flip the script. Now is the time for me to embrace who I really am and how I really am. I have wasted far too much time hiding in the shadows and being ashamed of who the real Peter is.

Life is short and its almost 2018. Use that fear and control it, not let that fear control you? That’s why I need to share my story. To show kids life can be fun, even though you’re different than others doesn’t mean you can be successful and live a great life? My fears are pushing me every day to get out of my comfort zone, and try and become a better person. What are your fears doing for you?

A New Chapter In Your Book

A New Chapter

A new chapter in your book is just about to begin, how do you want to start it? I challenge you to change this year in 2018. 2017 is basically over and were in the home stretch. With the New Year just around the corner, we have another opportunity to live and make the most of another year. I’m sure some people might have regrets about ohh I wish I did more of this or did that. Well sorry to break it to you, but those opportunities are long gone and there is nothing you can do about it. What you can do is make your next chapter in your book of life better in 2018.

What do you want to do? Are you going to commit to better yourself this year? Or just make the typical New Year’s resolutions that usually never work for people? Come January 1st you have 12 months to make that chapter the best you can make it. There’s no going back to edit it like I can edit this post. This is real life the actions you and I take will affect us every day. Will it be good choices or bad, the choice is yours?

New You

Every New Year is a start to a new chapter in our life book. If we’re lucky enough to have a chance and be a part of the New Year then we need to start making the most of it. Yes I know it’s easier said than done sometimes, and it’s hard I get it. I have been there and I’m still there some days. That’s life you just need to dig deep and keep going and working hard and do your best every day.

This next chapter for me in 2018 I want it to be the best chapter of my life. I know it will be and can be, as long as I keep working hard. It doesn’t look like my book will be published by the end of the year. If I publish it at the end of January. That means I already accomplished my number one goal in my life. It’s been a project in the making for the last three years. Plus I still have 11 months left in this chapter and this year. That momentum is only going to push me to keep going and working harder with the days ahead of me. That’s the motivation and the focus I have on my new chapter and opportunities waiting for me.

Keep Going

That’s the kind of mindset we need to start having, my mindset is not perfect. I just know where I was and where I want to go, from my past to working towards the future ahead of me. I don’t want to have any more regrets anymore. The remaining chapters that I have left I want them to be special and make the most of them why I can. I have a lot of work to make up for the time I lost earlier in my life. I’ll be 28 at the end of March which is only three months away. I still have a lot of goals to accomplish and complete before my 30th birthday. Slowing down now is not an option for me, I need to keep going and working hard every day.

It’s time I stop hiding from the world, and it’s about time that we embrace who we are. I know my faults and the issues I have to battle with every day. I’m not a big fan of change. Will use that as my example, and that’s a problem because my goal is to become an author and turn that into a career. Now if I want to turn that into a career there for I need to sell enough books that I can live off of that. Well, unfortunately, Peter has to get out of his comfort zone and suck it up. That’s something I don’t like and with the field, I’m trying to enter in full time. There will be a lot of change following that day when my book gets published. I’ll have to get over that fear of mine real quick.

What Will Your New Chapter Look Like

That’s why I know this chapter, and this year will be my best ever. Because I know where I was and what I was doing. Now I know what I want and the kind of impact I want to have on people’s lives, and more importantly kids’ lives. That’s what drives me; I don’t like being the center of attention and all eyes on me. That’s one of the reasons I keep to myself. If all eyes are on me, then I feel like I will make more mistakes in front of people or do or say something stupid.

That’s why I like to blend in with people. That’s why I try to keep to myself and hide behind my mask when I’m uncomfortable. It’s so easy to do that and I know it is wrong and a bad habit. When you pick up bad habits as a kid, unfortunately, it takes a lot of work to break those habits after all these years.

Now you heard about my mindset going into my new year and the next chapter in my book. What does your book look like? What kind of book do you want people to read every day as they talk to you or see you working? Do you want them to be proud of what you’re trying to do with the message you’re sharing and giving to people? Or do you want them to look the other way and stay far away from you and your book? We all have different goals and hobbies, I get that. The one thing that we all have in common is the same amount of time and days in a year. What are you going to do with your remaining days that you have left?

Definition Of A Rich Man

Rich Man

What’s your definition of a rich man? Is it an endless amount of money? Maybe it’s an expensive car or a big house? For me and what I think it’s not money and material objects, sure that might play a factor. For me, it’s the endless amount of time and the opportunities they put themselves in and try and open up.

Some people are born into wealth and they ride that expensive car all through there life. Never will have to work a day in there life. Some people like me for example. My parents, I don’t want to say rich or come off that way. My father owns his own business, so when things were going well money was coming in. When things were slow, and people were not sending in checks or he was not getting new business. Well, things were slow and he wasn’t getting paid, multiple times as I was growing up I was worried. There have been multiple times where things were very tight and it was a little scary at times.

The Stuff That Matters

My parents weren’t wealthy, what they lacked with endless amounts of money, they made up for in other areas. We have a roof over our head, food, water you know the stuff that we all take for granted some days. We had that, so that was very important.

As I was growing up over the years, and trying to figure out who Peter is and what I want to do? Right now, I’m far from rich and money, we aren’t even in the same zip code at the moment. I’m just squeaking by right now, with everything I’m trying to build right now and the hours I’m putting into my two jobs at the moment. I have a lot more work to do if I want to be labeled as a “rich man.”

For me, I don’t want to be your typical rich man. Sure do I want to have money and make sure if something comes up I can take care of that situation or help out my family or whatever that issue is, of course, who wouldn’t want that? For me wanting to be labeled as a rich man, that title goes way beyond objects and money. I want that title for the time, and what I give to the world. That’s the label I want, time is so precious and we waste so much of it every day.

Money Doesn’t By Time

Time is the one thing we can’t buy, and the one thing that doesn’t have a price tag. If you ask me what I think the definition of a rich man should be. It goes beyond a person’s net worth or the items he owns. When it comes to time, every single one of us is equal, and on the same level. It doesn’t matter who you are, we all have the same 24 hours every day, seven days a week.

That’s how a man and the definition of a rich man, or women should be defined as. We all have different backgrounds issues and roadblocks along our path every day. What the successful do is they find a way to win, and they don’t make excuses. Whatever comes up in front of them, they work there way around it, over it and if that doesn’t work, they plow over that sucker. They don’t let anything get in there way, they are committed to winning and already have there mind made up.

It Starts WIth One Step

That’s what we all need to start doing more, don’t just settle and look at how big that hill is we have to climb. You have to start somewhere and all it takes is one step to start? After you take that first step, then take another, and another and so on. If it takes you three years like how long my book has taken me, then who cares it takes three years? Some people in that time, maybe it would have taken them two years or a year and a half, the amount of the time is not the point. What is the point is were all different and are all in different paths and heading different directions? What’s not different is the amount of time we have every day to work on that hill.

If your committed and really committed then prove it, get up early and do what you need to do. Stay up that extra hour at night to work on that project. Right now you might see it as one extra hour a day, that’s seven hours a week if you do that for 31 days straight that an extra 31 hours put into whatever project it is your working on. After one month those 31 hours, don’t sound so bad and seem pointless anymore, does it?

Opportunites Are Everywhere

Everything I just shared and talked about that’s the kind of wealth I want and the title I’m looking for. Sure an endless amount of money and toys would be awesome and fun of course. You know what would be better if you have nothing or just getting by like me right now. You go on to build something bigger than you ever anticipated? We all have different goals and focused on different things in life, and all have different motivation pushing us. That’s fine that’s what makes life so interesting. All I’m trying to do is show you a different approach you could use for life.

The number of opportunities in our life right now and in the world is endless. It’s almost 2018, we shouldn’t be making any more excuses anymore. I’m trying to change my mindset and bad habits for the greater good to help people. What do you need to change?

We Are All Inventors

Inventors

“Who are the great inventors? They are the persons with plain, straightforward, common sense, who have seen a need in the world and applied themselves to supply that need.” This is from the current book I’m reading at the moment from Russell Conwell’s Acres of Diamonds in Motivation Classics. We are all inventors. Were all able to create magical things, as long as we believe and keep doing our best.

With everything I’m trying to share and what I’m talking about. I’m a different kind of an inventor; I’m not your normal inventor creating the next big device. I’m using my words and my past experience’s that I went through and lived the last 20 plus years of my life, and giving that to the world and the next generation. Yes I know I still have a lot of life to live, I get that. I realize some people I maybe didn’t live enough life to fully grasp it or understand everything.

I’m Just Different

I’m just coming from a different perspective and a different angle than most people. My wisdom and what I’m trying to share with the world and the younger kids. It’s coming from someone who just recently lived it and is still currently going through it. Why can’t we have both perspectives and use both angles? There’s no right or wrong answer here. Again this is coming from two different perspectives and two different views of the world. Honestly, the more input you can receive the better. You are going to get a better idea of what works what doesn’t. That’s going to help you find, what you need to do.

Determined

We are all inventors, whether you realize it or not. It doesn’t matter if you’re physically building something with your hands that you plan on selling down the road. Or you’re just building a life like what I’m trying to do. That’s the invention I’m trying to build; I’m trying to build a life that’s worth living and live it to the fullest before I’m taken out of the game of life for good. I’m trying to get the most out of the opportunities that are placed in front of me why I can.

I might not be that smartest, I know I have already established that in my earlier posts. But what I have noticed is, kids need help, I needed help when I was a kid. I’m not saying nobody helped me when I was a kid and growing up. All I’m saying is I think people again mostly kids, need to hear what I have learned and what I experienced.

Do I know everything and do I think my way is the highway and the best option, of course not. That’s the point; I’m trying to show kids the direction to stay as far away from as possible. That’s why I created my website and now I’m blogging. These are the reasons why I don’t want to just publish this book now for the heck of it; I need to publish this book.

Time To Man Up

Kids need help and if you haven’t noticed, so does the world. The world is a dark, dark place; I have been in a dark place for far too many years now. I’m trying to escape this tunnel I was in the last seven-plus years. I finally found the light in the tunnel then what happens, I’m walking and right smack dab in the middle of more darkness. Maybe it’s me? Maybe I’m always going to have a dark cloud over me the rest of my life?

If that’s the case well then so be it, I may have a dark cloud over me the rest of my life. But one plus about that is by sharing my story and my experience’s that might mean one less kid younger than me will have that dark cloud over himself. I know what life is like I know the feelings I have experienced and tasted over the years, the loneliness and feeling confused, and useless in the world. I’ve been battling those issues for years. I’m now starting to transition out of my negative mindset that I have had in the past.

When I wanted to join the military, yes I wanted to serve my country. Another reason as too why was so one other person didn’t have to. So that father or mother wouldn’t have to leave their kids and spouse to fight a battle they don’t have to fight. I have my family, yes and I’m beyond blessed I know, and of course, I don’t want to leave them. I have come to grips with the life I have now. I’m ok with that; I’m ok with being thrown to the wolves for whatever is waiting for me down my path.

What’s Your Invention

That’s why I can’t hide anymore, I need to suck it up and share my story and not put it off anymore. I have my problems yes, and honestly some of these problems I might have for the rest of my life. There’s only so much I can control with the cards I was dealt. But a young 12 or 13-year-old kid, they have time to change their ways and go a different direction.

This is my invention; no it’s not your typical invention I get that, if you think about it, every day we are all creating are on invention? Were all working on our own project, it is called life? We go different directions every day. All of us have different interests we enjoy and do. What makes your invention so special and unique? How are you going to present it to the world? Don’t expect anything from it, if you’re not willing to work for it and do the best you can. Now, what is your invention your going to give to the world?

Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone

Get Out

My comfort zone the last 20 plus years has been very small, not many people were really given the ok to enter and visit me. It was like my safe room only certain people had access to it. All these years going back to when I was a kid, keeping to myself and keeping a lot of private and personal stuff to myself. After living that way for a while, you start to get into a routine, like a rut.

This routine and rut lasted about 20 years of my life. I realized enough was enough it’s time to finish this book and give it to the people. If I sell one million copies the first year or 100 copies it doesn’t matter. Well ok, it does matter a little. If I only sell 100 copies then, I’m worried about my writing and what I’m really doing? That’s a topic for another day haha.

I want to be a new person; I need to be a new person. My lifestyle and the way I have been living the last 10 years especially, I couldn’t do it anymore. I realized something has to give. If I supposedly thought I was going to be “successful” and do something big with my life, then what do I do, where do you even begin? I had no idea what to do, just like when I started writing and now blogging and built my website. This is all new to me; I’m trying to enter a field I had never imagined I would be in.

2018

I’m hopefully about a month out from publishing my book. To be fair this isn’t just a book, and a story, this is my life written out. My emotions and intimate details about me and who I really am, spread out all over the paper. Most of the time when I feel safe and I feel alive, and free is when I’m alone and writing. I realized that I think I can do some good with my life that I spilled out into this book.

All though this is my life and this really shouldn’t be that hard writing everything. After all, it’s all from the mouth of yours truly Peter A Harrower. Even though looking back it’s easy to put everything down onto paper when I’m in the zone. Why is it when I know I’m finally done, it will be the hardest and scariest thing I will have ever done in my life to this point?

Once I hit publish, and my book is available to purchase. It’s because everyone is going to know who I really am, and the kind of person I really am? Well people, if you couldn’t tell or get that vibe that scares the CRAP out of me. I don’t want you people in my life, haha kidding. Your personal life is your business, it’s not mine unless you invite me to be a part of it. Just like what I did, you guys didn’t ask me to do any of this, I decided it.

Brace Yourself

I realized what I had put together and realized I was on to something. Even though it terrifies me to open up to the world and share my deepest darkest secrets with everyone. By the way, this blog is only a warm-up compared to my book. If all of my posts surprised you and you never knew I had this side of me or maybe thought this way. Well just brace yourself for when my book is available, it’s on a whole other level than this.

In the end, I realized that there are people, kids that are just like me. Having these same issues that I have, feeling stupid, confused, pissed off about life or toward the world, angry and don’t know where to turn next? I know what it was like, that’s why ladies and gentlemen this outcast wants to help people and kids just like me. No kid should have to go through all of this, and feel alone and against the world. We should all be in this together no matter what strengths and weaknesses we all have. Did you know 10% of kids have an LD?

My Comfort Zone

That’s why I’m throwing myself to the wolves. I don’t care what backlash might come from this, some people I’m sure are going to find a way to criticize me anyway. That’s life you can’t please everyone, so I’ve already been preparing for that for months now. My comfort zone started when I was six years old when everything started to change.

I can’t lie as much as I’m doing this for the kids, and want to help them feel safe and realize its ok to be different. I’m also doing this for myself, and I shouldn’t have to hide that or feel sorry about that. After all, I went through everything that I have talked about on my blog and in my book. Once I hit publish and get TWTMDE out to the public. I think that will be the last move I had to make to get out of my comfort zone.

Are you in a comfort zone, what are you hiding from the world, or even yourself? What do you need to do to lift that burden off of your shoulder? You don’t need to write a book or start blogging like me. Writing is my happy place that’s what I need. Were all different and unique that’s what makes all of us special. You need to figure out what will help make you feel safe and free?

Here’s a line from my favorite rapper at the moment, even though he’s talking about rapping his concept is the same as mine with writing and sharing my story. “I don’t rap, so millions of people will like me I rap, cuz there’s millions of people just like me” NF That’s the final piece I need to feel free for once, and finally able to start living.

My Letter To My Younger Self

Dear Peter

This is my letter to my younger self, going all the way back to March 25, 1990. Looking back, it has been a heck of a ride. You have been through so much. If only you knew what was waiting for you down your path? Well, you are going to find out soon enough. Whatever you do, just get ready. It’s about to get bumpy, and it won’t be easy.

You are going to have a lot of personal issues as the years go on, but it’s totally worth it. The reason is because of all your struggles and issues you will go through. They turned you into the person that you were meant to become and destined for. That’s how life works out sometimes buddy. You have to go through the bad and ugly, to get to the happy and great sometimes.

I can’t believe you are six years old now big guy. Everything is about to change, more then you could ever have imagined. From this point on going forward, all the way to now at 27, your life will never be the same. You were officially diagnosed with a learning disability, and now you have change schools. Nitrauer Elementary will be your next destination. It won’t be easy, but don’t worry there are a lot of good people that help you through that transition and all the way till graduation.

Don’t Fall For It

All you are focused on is graduation and to be done with school. I want to tell you first before you wish your life away and just skip to Graduation. All you can think about is to be through with school and out of that prison. Can you do me this one favor first? Don’t wish your childhood away like I did? Enjoy it while you can. It might be too late for me, but it’s not too late for you.

Focusing on the end Goal, and my future. With doing that, I missed out on my present and what I was currently living in. It might sound weird hearing this from your future self, but just listen and stay with me, Peter. Don’t do what I did, because I know what it’s like at the end of the road. Now I have to deal with that regret the rest of my life until the day I die.

Graduation

It is so hard to believe, you’re finally here it’s May 23, 2008, finally graduation day. High School is officially over for you! Congratulations man. I know this was your ultimate goal and all you were focused on. You should feel excited about what you just accomplished. We both know you don’t feel excited or feel like you accomplished anything. The feeling you are starting to get in your stomach is almost that sickening feeling.

You realized the mistake you made. Your time machine is broken. There is no going back now. The ultimate goal is here and you’re living it buddy, but it’s not what you expected. You were told a lie, you thought life was going to be easier and everything would fall into place. With being Dyslexic you had to adjust and look at life differently all these years. You might not like it, but it’s only going to get worse and bumpier ahead now.

Good Job

Well, you made it this far, from this point on, your life is about to change, for the better finally. July 12, 2015, you realized enough was enough it’s time to make a change for the better. Peter, it’s a great feeling, you finally realized that if you want a better life, then only you can change, it nobody else can. You are committed and willing to do whatever it takes to win finally and get away from the darkness and shadows that’s been holding onto you all these years. You realized your faults and personal issues you might always have. It’s time to put that to good use and help kids and people of all ages just like you and me.

2018

It’s almost the end of 2017, as crazy as that sounds 2018 is around the corner. Personally, I don’t know what 2018 will bring for us. I do know, you are almost done with working on and getting ready to publish your FIRST book. I know I still laugh about that every once and a while and smile about it. But wait, what, I’m dyslexic? I can’t read fast, or spell, I did horrible in school. How am I able to write a book? Let alone be close to publishing a 90,000-word book? It’s your story, our story, and you are doing it to give back to the kids that need to hear what we did wrong all these years.

Success

That’s why we are going to succeed, well do our best to succeed now, we have to succeed for them. With my past mistakes that I did and your future mistakes, you will see them soon enough. We can finally be ok and proud of what we accomplished so far. Now we’re finally living our life, now we have an idea what our future holds. Of course, nobody knows for sure. After all this time, and these issues we had growing up. Finally, at the end of 2017, we now know what it’s like to live and why we can’t take advantage of this beautiful gift of life anymore. It’s time we get out of our comfort zone and finally escape this tunnel, and leave the shadows behind us for good.

Don’t forget where you came from, and your past Peter? That’s what made you and help turn you into the person you’re meant to become. Yes, it was hard and we almost didn’t make it this far. But you didn’t give in and you didn’t stop, just like we can’t stop now. What we’re doing now, writing is not a hobby anymore, it’s our obsession. Let’s keep working, and keep this momentum going into 2018. Let’s make the next 20 years, better than our last 20 years.

My Unique Blog

What’s so special about my blog and website, why is it unique? Why should you take time to read this post, or check out my website? Because my website and posts are awesome and clearly it’s the best out there. I’m kidding, I’m only beginning, I have a lot to learn.

The reason is that of my background and everything that I’ve battled through my whole life. All the ups and downs of my life, the good and the bad have brought me to this point for a reason. For the longest time I was wondering why me, why did all of this happen to me? Why do I keep screwing up so much, when will I get it right? Well, that time is now, I think, I think, I might be on to something now people.

I think it’s safe to say this is the happiest I have ever been in my life. I also think it’s the most stressed, and exhausted I have been as well. Working three jobs really catches up with you, and quick haha. It is all worth it, and I’m not complaining. I’m hoping I’m a month away, from publishing my BOOK. Could I be a published author by the end of 2017? flashback to five years ago I didn’t even think I was going to be here today. I’m not being dramatic at all, it’s the truth. I really was at a low point and I gave up on life.

Peterharrower.com

I purchased my domain name three maybe four years ago, my dad told me I should just in case. My website is on the first page of google. Just my name Peter Harrower is on the top of the third page for Google. I know that isn’t that good but hey, it was at the bottom of the fourth page a week ago.

Life has a new meaning for me now. I finally feel purpose and meaning. I have my website, my blog, and my books that I’m working on. Diagnosed with a learning disability at six years old. Now I’m 27, I started out as a dyslexic boy with this journey. He finally feels like he has a reason to live and proud to call himself a man now. I’m determined to share my story with the world and get the word out with what I’m trying to share.

We all have our own battles and personal issues we are fighting every day, every week. I’m trying to show you that it doesn’t matter what issues you have. We all have our own issues, but how you handle those problems and setbacks, is how you find what you’re made of. You just have to keep going and fighting.

It’s time to finally start living. It’s time to smell the fresh air and walk in the sunlight for once. I can’t read fast, I’m horrible at spelling, never did well in school. I can’t sit in one spot for a long period of time; I get distracted after a while and it’s hard to focus. I’m self-conscious about myself, I have flaws and faults I’m trying to fix every day, and trying to become a better person.

Dark Tunnel

Even though I can’t spell, or read fast and was not good in school. With those issues and roadblocks hanging over me, I still want to become an author and share my story with the world. People need to hear my story; kids need to hear my story. I’m nobody special, I was born and raised in Lancaster, PA “Amish Country” and NO I’m not Amish haha.

I woke up one morning and realized enough is enough; it’s time to do something with myself. With my new attitude and the goals I came up with, it was time to change my ways. As much as it still scares me opening up to the world, it was time to open up and let you know who the real Peter A Harrower is and remove my mask, for good.

This started out as a hobby to help me cope with my depression, and anger, and all of my issues I’ve developed over the years growing up. Writing is the only place I felt free, the world came to a standstill, and I felt free. As I was writing I had the power and control with what I wanted to say. That hobby quickly turned into an obsession, after a few days. Now I have written three books, totaling north of 200,000 words and coming up with new ideas for my next projects.

The World Through My Dyslexic Eyes

Next is a fiction story I want to take to the box office, and turn it into movies. If you’re going to dream, then dream big? I finally found a purpose to live now. Do you know your purpose? What is something you have wanted to pursue, but you were scared to do? You’re not alone; I’m trying to enter a field I probably don’t belong in, and that terrifies me.

An author who can’t read fast, spell, and did horrible in school? I know how that sounds, I get it. I’m not normal, and I’m coming from a different angle. That’s what we dyslexics do; best, we look at our issues and problems from a different point of view. I may not be the smartest person, but my determination and drive to concur this goal cannot be stopped. I’ve tasted purpose and meaning in my life for the first time ever. I’ll find a way to win, and make these goals become a reality, and so can you.