What Do You Want
Work on yourself is very simple and straightforward. But how come for some, it’s so hard to do and it’s like pulling teeth to work on yourself? Now if you would have asked me when I was younger, working on my weaknesses and trying to get better. I would have been in that pulling teeth category unless it was sports then I might do it. I’m not saying I’m anything great but everything changed, now look at what I’m doing? I’m embracing my weaknesses and faults and my work ethic has changed.
If I hated working on myself and trying to talk about my flaws and weaknesses for most of my life growing up. How did I change, or more importantly what changed and why? Again I’m not saying I’m anything great or anything special I’m just talking out loud and trying to figure it out.
I think it all started because I didn’t like myself. Sorry, that’s an understatement I hated myself. I thought I was a loser, not successful, no potential and thought God made a mistake in creating in me. Is this a stretch with what I thought, no this is the honest truth? These thoughts flood through my veins from ages 6-25. Now I’m not saying this for a pity party or for you to feel bad for me. This is what happened and I need to fix it, simple as that. I chose to have this mindset and think this way, now I need to fix it.
When I started writing over eight years ago. I started writing for one thing and one thing only. Writing gave me hope, writing gave me a feeling and purpose that I never felt before doing anything else. From 21 until now all I thought about was writing and becoming an author and doing that full time.
What didn’t drive me and push me into the writing world was money and fame? I don’t like being the center of attention and I hate speaking and talking to others because I’m very self-conscious about my flaws and what I struggle with to this day and I don’t think I’m good enough.
Now did I dream and imagine what it would be like to create a career like John Grisham or J.K. Rowling, your absolutely right I did? But it wasn’t for the money and my own pockets. It was because I wanted to entertain others and help others and if money followed and it paid me enough to do this full time then that is an added blessing and bonus if you ask me.
I want to entertain people, and I believe I can with my “flaw” of mine. That “flaw” you could say helped put this crazy idea that my dyslexic self could become a published author and go and write books for a living. Well, I have published one and it was the second greatest moment in my life. It was very close but getting married and finding Lindsay will still always be number one in my books, pun intended haha. Then if we’re lucky enough and we have kids one day, then it will go Lindsay, Kids then writing at number three.
I always thought getting married and having kids was going to be way harder for me than publishing a book. I didn’t like myself, I didn’t believe in myself, I hated and resented myself. From a young age, I always believed I was going to do something special, I just didn’t know what.
Now my writing is opening up doors I never could have dreamed. For starters this coming year I will be going back to my old high school and working with some kids like me. That alone I can’t even fathom thinking about. Now I’m going to be going back and talking to kids about my story my experience and what I have learned. I feel like it was only yesterday I graduated from high school. Now I’m going back 11 years later as a friend, to try and help kids just like myself. Kids who might be in similar situations like I was at there age.
In about a week, I will be publishing my second book that I co-wrote with my beautiful wife. That’s something I never could have dreamed about, a lot of this I never dreamed about. None of this wouldn’t have happened if I didn’t keep working hard every day. Some days sucked, some days were hard, but others were great days and I’m grateful for all three.
Work Is A Must
I know it’s easy to focus on the bad and the bad sometimes always outweighs the good. Wait, that’s an interesting phrase, that would be a good blog post, ohh wait I did that. Don’t worry, it will be posted soon.
As long as you’re still breathing then you should always work on yourself every day, it should be a priority. Will it always be fun, no it won’t. Will it be hard and uncomfortable, of course? That’s why they call it work, it’s not always going to be fun. But it will make a bigger difference than you ever could have imagined.
Now Is The Time
That’s why I challenge you to always work on yourself. This phrase work on yourself came from Trent Shelton a great guy that I have been following for a while now. Never stop working on yourself. The moment you stop to work on yourself, I believe is the moment you give up on yourself and you don’t care anymore and are checked out.
That my friends is a sad way to go out. Just imagine if you worked a little harder, tried a little harder and gave a little more effort? Just imagine where you could have gone and what you could have done. Now is the time to stop imagining about it and start making it happen.