Discipline Vs Regrets

What Would You Pick

If your life was filled with one thing which would you pick discipline vs regrets? The choice should be obvious, but we all know and you’re smarter than that. The obvious choice doesn’t always happen. It’s discipline vs regrets, what are you going to do?

I’ll be honest now at 29 the last few years I became a very self-motivated person. Do I have my off days absolutely? I still have days that I feel like I didn’t do enough? Do I have days that I think I suck and I didn’t work hard enough and I could have done better, absolutely?

Choices

Here’s the thing, I didn’t just wake up one day and say you know what, I’m going to be more self-disciplined and then you go on and take on the world. Yes, you might say the words and realize you want to better yourself and do better. But it’s not that easy, depending on how old you are. You have probably been living bad for years or you weren’t the most disciplined person in the world.

It takes time people and it takes work, don’t beat yourself up. I know it’s hard. Because I beat myself up and I rip myself apart far too much. I get so mad and feel like a failure. Am I really a failure in life because I didn’t get two things done on my list for the day, no. But that mindset of holding myself to a higher standard is what’s going to help me do better, and be a better person. Will I want to do it, no some days I want to just play video games like the old days and kick my feet up and chill.

Push Yourself

Is inflicting pain on myself why working out fun, yes, it is. I love it! Why would I want an easy workout, why would I just want to coast through it, how does that benefit me by doing easy stuff or the same thing day after day? The answer you’re looking for is it won’t benefit you at all. It will actually hurt you in the long run.

Why and how would it hurt me in the long run, great question thanks for asking? It’s going to hurt you because you’re potentially missing out on your future you that you were destined to become. That’s how it’s going to hurt you. If it’s just you, well then, it’s going to hurt your future self and the person you were meant to become. Say you’re married it will hurt your spouse. If you have kids it’s going to hurt them because they see the effort you put in.

Perspective

This poor mindset has been a battle my whole life. Some days I wanted to quit and not pursue writing anymore. I thought it was going to be too hard to publish my book and become a published author. My negative mindset and lack of confidence in myself almost prevented me from pursuing this dream of mine and turning it into a reality.

Imagine if I quit, what would I be doing. Honestly, I don’t even know and the scares the crap out of me even more than what I’m pursuing right now. I have no idea what I would be doing, who knows if I would even be alive. But I do know, I am alive and still breathing and happier then I have ever been in my life.

Stay Tuned

I’m now pursuing a career that always was a vision and dream in my head. It was a dream I have been looking at on my dry erase board for over five-plus years now. I wanted to be a published author when I started writing in the summer of 2012.

Now here I am at 29 and about a month away from publishing my second book with my wife. It was a project that we have been working on for the last couple of months. I can’t wait for the world to read this story that Lindsay and I have been working very hard on.

Enjoy the Small Wins

Another reason why I know I’m hard on myself or so focused and tunnel vision is because Lindsay tells me and people tell Lindsay how much we have done in the first 10 months of our marriage. She says we have done a lot, friends have said we have done a lot. I feel like we have done well and trying to prevent an argument, I say we have done a decent amount haha.

I think it’s just my mindset, somedays I’m so focused on the end result and kicking butt every day trying to get to the finish line. That I struggle to enjoy the moments when we’re going through them. It takes me some time to catch my breath and look back and think, wow look at what I did or we did together. I know it’s not the best mindset and view, but I’m working on it, sorry babe.

Flaws

I know I have my faults and my weaknesses that I’m still working on. But here’s the thing I’m always going to be working on those and trying to get better every day. The time I die, I’m not going to have any regrets, because I’m working my tail off to fulfill my purpose and what I believe God put me here on earth to do.

Now if I die a year from now, then yes, I’ll have a lot of regrets I would only be 30. But I’m talking about 50 plus years down the road. 50 years might sound like a lot, but it will come faster than you think. In the next 50 years. Do you want to work hard and live a good life? Or play it safe and just live and put your dreams and goals on the side because you’re scared of taking a risk? The answer should be obvious, it’s about time we start building some discipline and take are regrets and turn them into realities.

A Graveyard

Times Change

When I saw a graveyard when I was younger, it freaked me out with all of the dead bodies. I’m sure that would have scared a lot of kids or made them uncomfortable.

When I was struggling and in my funk in my early 20’s I was confused, lost and searching. I didn’t know what I was searching for, I was just searching for something, anything better than my reality. I was fascinated with death and curious about it. At the time I felt like I wasn’t even living yet or really doing anything special with my life. I felt like a waste of air and felt useless to the world.

Motivated

A couple of months ago I started to get fascinated with graveyards and death again. But in a different way this time. Not like in the dark way that I once thought of in my early 20’s.

I started thinking about and seeing all of these different tombstones at a graveyard. Now I still don’t want to get old, and I’m not looking forward to it. But unfortunately, that’s one fight that all of us will lose every time and we won’t be able to outrun aging and death when it’s our time.

But what started to push me more and make me think more is graveyards. Think of any graveyard you ever saw in your life. Think of how many people die every day. I’m curious the percentage of those people that were happy by the time they died? Have you ever thought about that? What about the percentage of people that liked their life? Were they pleased with the effort they gave why they were on earth, still breathing until death found them?

Can I Be Successful

I know its kind of dark and weird I get it, haha, but stay with me. For most of my life failure and death scared me. I don’t want to get old I’m not ready to die yet. Now success scared me, I never felt like I did anything great or special with my life. Now I’m an author and chasing down my dreams every day. In the back of my mind, I always wondered what if I become successful and everything changes?

You can look at it two ways. First, I could do nothing and stay where I am and go with the flow. Work hard for my wife but just enough to have a safe life. I don’t push myself or don’t challenge myself because that will be hard. Or second, what if I push myself so freaking hard, that all of these years of being a dream chaser and hunting down my goals. Publish multiple books, reach over a million people have my fiction series turned into movies and so on. What if I worked so hard that my dream job became real and I was making enough that Lindsay could stay home with our future kids?

Now One

Between Lindsay and myself we have two different lives. She knew from a young age what she wanted to do in life. Me, I just was focusing on getting my diploma and being down with school. Lindsay makes good money, but it doesn’t come easy she works her tail off every day and for us. I know I’m lucky for how hard she works and I don’t say it enough, thanks, babe. Me on the other hand, I do ok I guess you could say. But my income could not take care of both of us, I will leave it at that.

What if in a few short years my books take off? My speaking starts to get bigger and my impact on the world by helping young adults and people grows? With that change, what if Lindsay doesn’t have to work as much or any more and can stay home. Who knows maybe work on this business with me and we could do it together. Honestly, that will scare the crap out of me because everything will be on me now. But I welcome that and that’s what I’ve been praying for.

Giving Back

This life is what I have been dreaming about since I was 21. Not the money side, writing, entertaining and helping others and making a difference. If I can make enough money doing what I love and have a great life then that is an added bonus and I’m even more blessed then I deserve if you ask me.

When it’s my time and God calls me home I want to leave multiple things behind. Not money, well maybe some money to help my wife and kids hopefully. That’s not what I want to be remembered for. I want to leave behind a work ethic and the fact that I didn’t settle and I was never content with being average. I chased my fears down and overcame them, I chased down the success I always wanted but was humble and didn’t let it change me.

Start Living

I don’t want to die with any regrets or great ideas buried inside of Peter when I take my last breath. I want to leave everything out on the court or the field, like when I played sports. Looking back, I think I could have tried harder in sports. But I can’t do anything about that now. What I can do though, is make up for the time I have now and that’s ahead of me, and so can you.

Now is the time to start living, not tomorrow or next week. That’s not guaranteed. What is only guaranteed right now is the moment you’re in. Now become a dream chaser like me and make the most of your life why you can. Don’t play it safe knowing the time you die, everyone wonders and is talking about the person you COULD HAVE BEEN. That should terrify you if it doesn’t then something is wrong. If you do it right they will be talking about the person you were and what you did with the time you had.

Creating Something From Scratch

Scariest Thing 

Have you ever felt the desire to create something? Have you ever felt that burning sensation in your belly, not after you eat something bad or you feel sick? I’m talking about that feeling and sensation that you know deep down inside of you that you want to take this new job, start this new business or take this different path on your journey? Creating something from scratch and starting something brand new can be one of two things. The scariest thing or the most rewarding thing you do. 

Yes, I was terrified and freaked about writing and if it would actually work. I’m not the smartest guy around, I suck at spelling grammar and well everything that has to do with school. I don’t like reading in front of people. I’m very self-conscious about myself. How could I write five books in the last eight years, let alone one? How can I publish a book, who would ever want to read my crazy story?  

Most Rewarding

I’m not an expert I’m still trying to figure all of this out as I live and start a new day every morning. With that mindset of the unknown and scared, I didn’t know what to do. That my friends is exactly why I wrote those books and decided to leave my safe place and my comfort zone. I was tired of not living, holding myself back and being my biggest enemy and toughest opponent. 

Now with this being the scariest thing I have ever done. It quickly transitioned to the most rewarding thing I have ever done in my life. I’ll be honest if you don’t have a type of learning disability you will you never be able to wrap your head around the struggles and issues going through school every day. The embarrassment, the lack of confidence in yourself and all of the other side effects that follow. Now you might have something you struggle with that I know nothing about it, I get that. I’m not going to sit here and say I have it harder than you and my life is harder because most likely it’s not. 

Become A Inventor 

With the side effects, I struggled with daily. Even through those tuff times, I never stopped believing I was meant to create something. Yes, sometimes I had to lie to myself or trick myself into writing and trying to be positive to get my work done when I didn’t want to. But hey, you got to do what you got to do.

In my whole life, I never felt more hunger, passion, and determination until I decided to start writing and wanted to publish a book. I had no idea how to do it, I’m still trying to figure it out and my book has been out for almost five months already. That’s what a lot of people mess up and don’t understand. Just because you don’t know everything or every little detail doesn’t mean you shouldn’t start or you shouldn’t confront that burning desire you have to create or do what you want to do.

My Purpose

That is the exact reason why you need and should want to do what’s burning and filling up inside of you. That burning desire, that’s passion and purpose that’s forming inside of you. Creating my books and writing and putting everything together is by far one of the greatest achievements I have ever had the opportunity to be a part of. 

Now getting married and publishing my book were my top two things in my life I wanted. I never thought I would be good enough to have a Mrs. Harrower by my side. When I was younger as a dyslexic kid, I would have rathered stare at wet paint and watch it dry then open a book or write. I never thought I would be where I am today.

I Feel Alive Again 

Getting married is hands down the best decision and the biggest surprise that ever could have happened for me. I still struggle with this every now and then thinking I’m married and how lucky and blessed I am. But publishing my book and writing my four other books is by far the biggest and best achievement that I also never thought I could accomplish or thought was possible. Lindsay knows how I feel about this and she knows she means the world to me and I would do anything I could for her.

This burning desire that’s been burning inside of me over the last eight years is way bigger than I ever could have imagined. The years, the days and the number of hours I have spent working on my books and trying to bring these books to life have given me more hope and purpose than I ever could have imagined.

Now Is The Time 

That’s why I challenge you to create something from scratch. Don’t be afraid of that burning desire and that hunger and passion that’s forming inside of you. Embrace that passion, hold on to it as tight as you can and never let go. Never let go of your dreams. Do everything you can to become that dream chaser you always envisioned yourself you could be. 

Those dreamers aren’t going anywhere in life, but you are and you can. Don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t do that, or your idea won’t work and it won’t be successful. Maybe it won’t work, maybe it will take longer then you thought. Yes, that will be frustrating and it will suck I get it and have been there. But after working on that dream project and trying to bring your desire out to the world, maybe those failures will take you a different direction you weren’t anticipating. That’s a good thing because if you didn’t take that chance to bring those desires out to the world. If you didn’t take that chance, then who knows where you would be today and what you would be doing?   

Second Chances

1st Go Around

From ages, 6-25 was a hard stretch for me. But I’m here to let you know and remind you that it doesn’t matter what your past was like or where you came from or what you did or didn’t do. As hard as it is for me to say this and yes, I’m very stubborn and hot-headed sometimes. I think everybody deserves a second chance in life. I say that now because I got one.

Now when you here second chance what do you think it means? Maybe they did or didn’t do something and now they are paying the consequences now for what happened. Well, that’s what I’m doing now. My second chance is not a typical second chance. 

Round 2

With my first chance and go around, yes, I was young and you could say in the first part of my life I was still trying to figure some stuff out. Where I am right now my second chance definitely outweighs my first, there’s no comparison.

My first chance I was struggling to find myself and figuring out who Peter is and what I want to do in my life. What the world needs from me and searching for my purpose and finding direction. I’ll be honest, I’m still trying to figure all of that out even now at 29. But for the first time in my life, I’m happy to say I think I’m getting closer.

Reality Check

I finally feel like I’m moving in the right direction. I got married and published my book. Now, I have published one and have four more in draft mode. I published 120 posts on my website. With all of my posts, I have shared over 120,000 words on my website alone. In my five books, I have probably written around 250,000 words. 

Did you ever think that maybe God wanted you to live a little and see the world and experience life? That’s a concept I didn’t understand for a while. I wanted to know right now, what I was supposed to do and my purpose. Well for all of you impatient people like me, news flash, it doesn’t work like that. It took me a long time to understand that.

I Can’t Help

I have recognized a few things in the last year. First is I don’t deserve any of this. I always saw myself as two different people, the real me and the me on the outside that everyone sees every day. The only problem was the side you saw on the outside wasn’t actually Peter, I was wearing a mask and hiding my true colors and issues and problems.

Life is hard and it takes work, sometimes it sucks and sometimes it’s not fun. But that can’t be the reason why you give up or stop trying. There were so many times I wanted to say screw it, I’ll be a pawn in this game of life and go with the flow. I’ll let other people in the world do amazing things and help people they come across. They don’t need me to do it, what can I even do?

Big Goals, Big opportunities

You have to forget about what you did in your past and what happened. It’s over now and its finally time to move on and get over it. Yes, sometimes it’s easier said than done, I won’t disagree with you on that. But if you want to live, and I mean truly live then it’s time to stop fighting your past and what you did or didn’t do or struggled with and make it up with your present and future. I was always embarrassed about my past. With all of my ups and downs, I was going through and struggling with. In the end, those issues were giving me the life experiences I needed to grow and become the person I was meant to become.

If I would have gotten all A’s and B’s in school I most likely would have gone to college. Now from there who knows what would have happened next. But I can tell you this, most likely I never would have read that book about 2Pac that got me to start journaling and writing in the first place. 

Looking back now with where I came from, where I currently am and where I want to go. I have big goals, just ask my wife or family they will tell you. Helping kids and young adults not go down the wrong path like me is a top priority. I want to help and influence people with my books, my blog or just be a friend to them. I want to create a six-figure income and build my own business one day doing what I now feel I was meant to do. Another goal is to have Lindsay stay home full time and take care of our kids down the road one day like I know she wants to. 

Live It Up

Yes, if you couldn’t follow along those are some big goals I just shared. I’m not going to apologize about those goals because we only have one life to live and one opportunity to live, why not make the most of it and have fun along the way. That’s the kind of mindset we all should have. I want that money so I can put that responsibility on my shoulders and not my wife’s. Yes, she makes more money than me but I don’t really care. What I care about is her not having to stress over it or feel like she has to work more and pick up more hours for us. That’s what bothers me in this situation. 

I challenge you to not run away from new opportunities that come your way. Yes, they might be scary and intimating but that’s all part of the fun. Embrace your mistakes and have fun with it. Don’t be afraid of success and failure roll with it. When you can do that, that my friends is when you start to live. 

What Is Your GPS Telling You

Where Are You Going 

When you look at a GPS what do you see? You see the road your own of course and sometimes it might show other scenic stuff. You will see streets and other roads around you. When you’re driving and moving along what is your GPS telling you? Where you need to go, when your next turn is or how far you are from your destination.

Have you ever been on a road and took a wrong turn or missed your turn and depending on if you’re in a good mood or bad you here that horrible word “recalculating” depending on your mood is how you react to that.

Me and The Road 

When I look at my GPS of my life? I see where my starting point is and where my end point is. Now the only difference is that I don’t have a voice telling me where to turn and what to do. On the screen, it’s not telling me in 600 feet turn left, or your destination is on your right. My GPS doesn’t say anything like that.

My GPS only shows my soundings and roads and that’s it. There are no markings to show me what I’m near or names of the streets around me. It’s all blank, I’m guessing trying to figure out what turn I want or where I’m going along my journey in life.

Where Am I Going 

Some people’s GPS might show their end destination and they have clues along the way showing them what they will be doing next. What I mean is if they already have college or a career figured out and plans along those lines. That’s what’s so fascinating about everyone. Everyone’s map is different, but how you use that map and what you did with the map your given is what makes you special.

I had no direction after high school, all I knew was I wasn’t going to college and I always believed I was going to do something different and special one day. That’s the honest truth. 10 years ago, I would have been out of high school for a year with no direction and just beginning to start searching. If I would have seen my future self and what I had accomplished in the next 10-years I would have called bull crap and said it was a lie.

What Changed 

The Peter I know hates reading and writing. That’s impossible, there’s no way that he has read almost 60 books and written five books in 8 of that 10 years and also been married for almost six months? Well, younger self it’s true. I’m still trying to make the most of my journey and the time I lost.

Yes, I did have a starting point when I was born and also have an ending point where my destination will come to a stop. But here’s the thing when I get to my destination that is when my life will end and it’s game over. Even though I might have taken a lot of wrong turns and looking back now, maybe they weren’t wrong turns after all? Maybe they were the turns I was supposed to be taking trying to get me to my destination. I’m glad I climbed those steep hills and made wrong turns or hit dead ends and had to turn around. Those hiccups or struggles I faced is what’s turning me into the person I was meant to become.

More Work To Be Done 

I wouldn’t change anything. I’m not ready to reach my destination yet, I’m only starting to live. Now, in this case, my destination is my career and what my purpose in life is. But my final destination, I’m not ready for that yet and trying to stay as far away from that as possible.

Sometimes in life, we take wrong turns, we get lost and well it sucks and it’s not fun. If we take a wrong turn or get lost, sometimes it takes us to something beautiful that we never expected or would have guessed we would ever see.

Keep Moving Forward   

If you took a wrong turn recently for example. Then embrace it and think about where you are right now? Recognize a couple of things. You’re still alive, you didn’t reach your final destination that’s good. You’re still moving and you’re still trying your best every day and you didn’t give up. That’s very important you can’t give up and just quit. What if you just stopped where you are? But one mile down the road on your left is the Swiss Alps and all you see is miles and miles of mountains and snow with open fields and flowers below?

If your picturing that like I am then that would be a beautiful picture if you ask me. Who wouldn’t want to see that? Imagine if your upset at what happened and you turn into this view. That would be a sweet reward for getting lost and supposedly making a wrong turn, wouldn’t it?

My Journey Through 31 Days

Enjoy The Ride 

With that don’t be too hard on yourself for making a wrong turn or getting lost. Now I can say that now because I lived through it, I’ve been there and I have taken those “wrong turns” many times. But again, I don’t think those were wrong turns that I took.

I want to enjoy myself and have fun why I can. After all, we only get one shot at life, we should live it up and have fun. Have fun and make the most of your life and help people along the way. That should be the goal for us all. Sometimes you need to cut out the noise around you, turn your GPS off and follow your heart. What is it deep, down inside of you that you want to pursue? What do you have a calling to do? Maybe your still searching and that’s ok. I’m 29 and I’m still searching and feel like I have only just begun. 

Ruts Are Killer

Stay Away

Ruts are killer and dangerous. They can ruin your life and hurt your goals and potential by doing the same thing dad after day, week after week. If you get caught up doing the same bad habits that aren’t going to help you in the world and help you grow to become a better person then no good can come from it.

I have been in a rut hundreds of times over the years and let me tell you they are not fun. Doing the same thing every day religiously can be very bad. Especially if you’re not in a good place or you’re not happy and feeling good about yourself.

Something New

I’m in a rut right now.  Now don’t get me wrong I’m very happy and blessed. But when I say rut what I’m really referencing is my workouts. I haven’t really been feeling it the last month, month and a half.

I know I need to shake it up, and shake it up I must. Now part of the reason why I haven’t been enjoying my workouts as much as I have in my past. Well, I want to write that’s all I want to do every morning. When I go to the gym after about 30 maybe 45 minutes I look at my watch and think I’ve done enough.

Not Always Bad

Now physically that’s not good because I’ve been slacking with my workouts and not pushing myself as hard as I know I could be and should be pushed. I love being challenged and I love sweating and feeling tired and good after a workout and proud of what I have done the last hour or however long. I haven’t felt that for a long time.

Now a plus with that and a good thing with that is I have been getting a lot more writing done on my books. So, it’s not a complete loss haha. I’m still very productive and always am every day. It’s just on the physical side, I haven’t pushed myself as hard as I should be.

Time for A Change

That’s why I’m starting a challenge tomorrow. It’s my 29th bday today, so I have one more day of freedom haha. I will be doing a challenge called #75Hard.

  • Work out twice a day for 45 minutes one workout must be outside
  • Drink a gallon of water a day
  • No cheat meals
  • No alcohol and I like my Merlot
  • Read 10 pages a day of a self-improving book
  • Progress pic daily

Will it be fun absolutely and I can’t wait. I wanted to start earlier but with my birthday I decided to do it after. Will it suck, probably, I have never done anything like this before. Is it going to be challenging absolutely, but that’s what I need? I need a good change of pace.

Early Bird

I started getting up earlier every morning to read a couple of pages in whatever book I’m reading. Then I work on my book till Lindsay wakes up. It ranges from 45 minutes to an hour in the morning and then I have breakfast and do my devotions. I feel better doing that because I don’t like sleeping in.

Getting up a little earlier helps me to accomplish a couple of things before the day really even starts. I think that’s a positive way to start the day doing a couple of productive things in the morning.

What About You

Are you in a rut? Now a rut could be anything. For me, it happens to be the gym. That’s why I’m happy I found this challenge and it couldn’t have come at a better time for me. I needed something new and I needed to be tested, challenged especially mentally.

If you are in a rut, what is it? Do you know you’re in a rut and just lying to yourself and trying to hide it? That’s not good and will only hurt yourself down the road. For me, I knew I was in a rut for a while I just didn’t know what to do to mix it up.

Now thankfully I heard about this challenge from one of my favorite podcasts. That’s what you need is something to kick your butt to test you and push you. That’s where a lot of people get it wrong nowadays. They see something challenging or hard and just give up and don’t even try, that my friends is sad.

A Much Needed Change

I have dealt with a lot of challenges over the years, realistically I’m sure we all have. Well if you haven’t had any challenges or struggles or any setbacks, then honestly what are you doing with yourself and your life? That’s how you grow and that’s how you find yourself and see what you’re made of.

It took me a long time to realize that. If I want to better myself and challenge myself then I need to do the things I’m not good at. From a young age, I always thought that was a stupid mindset. Well, as I got older I started to pick up and follow that stupid mindset and challenge myself.

Weaknesses to Strengths

Now, look at me. I have been married for almost six months. It’s crazy how fast that’s going already. I’m a published author and working on finishing four more books currently. The goal is to get one if not two hopefully done later this year.

Challenges are what makes you. Your struggles are how you find what you’re capable of. Ruts on the other hand that’s what kills you and your dreams and goals. When you start to recognize you’re not happy and doing the same thing over and over. Take a step back and look at what you’re doing.

If you’re in a rut then change it right away. If you don’t then you will be holding yourself from your potential growth and preventing yourself from getting to where you were ultimately supposed to be. That is a big loss and a big mistake. That my friends is a wasted life.

Just Being Me

It Will Happen

Just being me is a line from one of my favorite artists NF. I’d rather die than let this dream go to waste. You can tell that I ain’t playin’ by the look up on my face.

Whenever I hear this line, I always think back to when I told Lindsay for the first time what I wanted to do with my writing. I didn’t know it at the time but a couple of weeks later she told me what she thought. She knew how serious I was with the look on my face when I was telling her about my books and what I want to do.

Roll With It

From a young age, I wanted to make a difference and I always thought and believed that I would do something special and unique. The only problem was I didn’t know what that was haha. I knew with my disability that I saw the world differently than most. I knew my views and outlook towards the world are not like others and that’s ok. Well, now its ok at 28 saying that. I didn’t like it when I was younger.

Now just like NF said I’m Just Being Me and I’m ok with that. I’m different than most, I have a unique story compared to most. Now do I have days I get upset or mad when I don’t know what a word means or how to spell a certain word for example. Yes, I do, it sucks and I hate that moment that I’m in when I have to ask my wife or someone around me. It’s embarrassing, but this is just who I am and one of the issues I have to deal with and battle every day.

Embrace It

I’m not proud of that part with my disability but I guess in order to take the good you have to take the bad sometimes with it. Well, that’s my bad. When it comes to school I’m not on the same level as most. I am and will always be four or five grade levels behind everyone if not more.

Yes, that sucks and it’s embarrassing. But what helps me to feel better and make me get over my faults and those embarrassing moments of mine. Is that I’m not putting my weaknesses behind me like I once did when I was younger. I’m now embracing them and using them to help others and make a difference.

Slow Down

I never liked being a burden on others around me like my family or wife for example. I never wanted to be the one to slow somebody down in life. For years I wanted to die and end my life to take away the pain and to help escape from it. Now I realized how wrong that is. I don’t want to escape the pain anymore. I welcome it because I now believe God made me this way for a reason and put everything on me for a reason.

Personally, if you ask me, getting old still kind of freaks me out a little bit. Because time is going so fast. I’ll be 29 in a month. This May will be 11 years from when I graduated. In case you haven’t noticed people, time isn’t slowing down for us.

My True Intentions

I don’t want to be 80 years old or whatever the age and be a burden on my wife or family or hopefully future kids. To me by the time I get to 80 I want to look back and be proud and smile at what I have done and the impact I hopefully have on people. Do I need to be worth a million dollars or more, no, of course not? Do I need to be recognized around the world or the community for what I’m doing no?

The main people that I want to see what I’m trying to do and share from my heart, not my ego. Is my wife, family, and God? Because those are the most important people to me.

I want to make up for the time I lost when I was younger. I want to help the younger kids coming up and going through the fight and the struggles like I was going through a short time ago. I want to help them and be there for them if they need someone to talk to. That’s why I’m still blogging and trying to give you all the material you need.

Checked Off

I want to speak and share my unique story with kids around the world and share with them what I have learned in the last 10 years alone. I want them to know its ok to be different and different is not always a bad thing. Embrace being different and embrace who you are. Besides once you are ok with what you can do and can’t do that’s when life starts to become more fun and more enjoyable.

I dreamed and prayed for years that I would become a published author and get married. In a matter of 76 days, I check off both of those goals at the end of 2018. I was created for something special and it was just my mind telling me and filling me with those lies for years.

My Reason

I now recognized that and that’s what I want to share with YOU. Do I need to sell millions of books no? Do I need the publishing deal and the recognition no? I don’t need the fame or the money to feel like I accomplished something.

The reason how I’m going to know if I’m making a difference in people’s lives and getting through to them. Is if they were scared of something and now pursuing it like I am. They got out of there comfort zone and trying new things now and pursuing new opportunities in life and what’s ahead of them.

Dream Chaser vs Dreamer

Dreamer

If you asked me when I was back in high school or a little younger what a dreamer was. I would have said somebody who has a dream or goal they want to pursue or accomplish in their life. Something big they want to do to feel an achievement or proud of themselves for pursuing something bigger. Now I’m going to tell you why a dream chaser is way better than a dreamer.

Here we are 2019. I’ll be 29 at the end of March. I’ve been married for a couple of months. My new book has been out for over a month, it’s still crazy saying that haha and probably always will be.

Dream Chaser

If you asked me the same question when I was around 21 or 22. I would have told you something completely different than just a couple of years before. I have been writing for over a year, and I know what my dreams are. To get married, which I never thought that would happen. Publish a book and share my story with the world and make a difference by helping people.

Well, first things first. I have been married for a couple of months. This time last year I was single and just starting to talk to Lindsay for the first time. I never pictured where I would be today. Now I’m happily married, one goal and dream done♠ (I couldn’t find a check mark, so a spade it is haha.)

Keep Going

Next publishing a book. What a kid with an LD and dyslexia how can he publish a book? Well if you were thinking that, or you weren’t. Just pretend you were please so I can answer that question. The answer is this guy with the LD and dyslexia. Or another way you can answer it is, so can YOU.

For years I never thought I could accomplish anything with this baggage over me and weighing me down in life. Until I finally realized a couple of years ago, how stupid and wrong that is. Just because I read slow and not good with spelling and grammar and everything else in school. That doesn’t mean I can’t write a book. I could have some awesome book ideas, but I just need help with the editing.

More To Come

Personally, I do feel like I have a lot of good ideas. Also, I think I’m a pretty good writer. By writer, I mean coming up with different ideas and using my imagination. As far as the editing and grammar and punctuation side of it, well let’s just move on, it will be easier haha.

Now, look where we are. I published my first book♠. I have written three other books. I have a couple more books that I know I want to write at some point.  Now I’m just trying to enjoy the ride and take in what I accomplished.

A Little Hard Work

I can finally tell people I’m not just a dreamer anymore like most of the world. Now, this isn’t a shot at them or a negative statement at them it’s just my opinion and an observation. I used to be just a dreamer. Now it’s amazing if you switch some things around and change a little of this and that, look at what can happen? You become what you have been searching for a dream chaser, and now you’re no longer a dreamer.

As much as I prayed and hoped I could publish a book. A small percent of me never thought it would actually happen, as sad as that is. It took a lot longer than I would have liked and I was expecting. But now that I went through it and saw what I battled to get to where I am now holding my book that I brought to life. I know first-hand that with a little hard work, anything is possible.

It’s Possible

A dyslexic kid becoming an author is that possible? A girl taking a chance on a guy who was broken for so long and needed a lot of help and giving him hope is that possible? A guy who hated his life for years. A guy who never thought he could accomplish anything or be successful in life. Can now officially share with the world that he crossed off his top two goals in a three-month span. So, can you?

All you have to do is keep working and keep going. I’m here to tell you that you can do it. Yes, I know as lame as that might sound haha. Ohh sure you can do this or that or whatever it is you want to do. But it’s true, accomplishing these two dreams and goals of mine, has given me more hope and purpose than I ever imagined.

Focused

I found a woman to love me for me no matter what I struggle with or am not good at. I turned a weakness of mine and a lot of stuff I’m not good at or struggle with daily into something positive hoping to make a difference in people’s lives.

Do I have my off days and not feeling up to it or proud of what I’m trying to do? Of course, and most likely I will always have days like that. But in the end what brings me back to reality is what I have in front of me and what I can touch and see in front of me now.

Keep Going

What I saw was hope and purpose. I feel more alive than I ever did. Now if my book, blog or story doesn’t make as big of an impact as I thought it would. Well that will be unfortunate and maybe it wasn’t meant to be, but at least I tried my best and gave it my all. I didn’t just stop and take in what I accomplished and smiled. Yes, I enjoyed it and I’m still enjoying it. But I kept working and I didn’t give up.

Embrace your unique story and share it with the world

298 Hours Till Completion

Number 1 Goal

If you would have told me back in August 2014 that all I would have to do is work for a total of 298 hours and I will publish my book. I probably would have laughed at you. That is almost 12 and a half days of my life I worked on this book. Who would have thought only 298 hours till the completion of my book and I would become a published author?

I’ve been dreaming of this day for over seven years. Now that it’s finally here it feels surreal and hasn’t really kicked in yet. You have to understand over four years this book has been in the back of my head taunting me for that time. Wondering if I will ever publish it and share it with the world. Thinking sometimes it’s going to be a bust and I won’t sell any copies or help anybody. Thinking I will chalk it up as another failure for Peter.

Between My Ears

Yes, it can be very draining living inside of my mind. I don’t want to be this way, I don’t want to be this negative or this down all of the time. It’s a consistent game I’m playing all of the time. It’s like tennis going back and forth with positive vs negative.

Even if this book would have taken 1,000 hours I wouldn’t have cared. If the average book from start to finish takes a couple months or 100 hours it doesn’t matter. What matters is I made up my mind on my goal and I was committed to seeing it through till the end no matter what.

In my 28 years of life, I have never been more committed and more focused in my life. August 6th, 2011, I made a commitment that day when I started my first novel. That was the first book in my fiction series. From that day till December 21st, 2018 my main focus was to finish what I had started. Publish my first book.

Determined

I have lived most of my life without goals and motivation and drive in my life, and look where that got me? Yes, do I believe that all played a factor in my life to bring me to this point absolutely. But that doesn’t mean I couldn’t have made that path I was on for over seven years a little easier. Yes, everything happens for a reason. But I believe we have the opportunity to control some of the things that come up in our life and control that outcome.

When I started my first novel seven years ago. I knew it wasn’t going to be easy and it was going to be hard. Especially with how much I struggle with reading and writing I knew it would be challenging. But I didn’t care what the time frame was or how long it took me. I started writing and never looked back.

New Challange

Now I didn’t publish my first book I started but that’s ok. Things change and new things came up for me over that time.  A few years ago, I just switched my focus to my memoir. I felt like sharing my unique story was more important at the time than a fiction series I created.

My book has only been out for about a week so far. There hasn’t been a crazy number of books sold so far. Which is about what I expected. Every day I move forward this business is still all new to me. I’m trying to take in the fact that I finally published my first book, I should be happy. I’m now a published author. But I’m now a business owner and now I have to take care of everything. This is where the real fun begins and my inner Entrepreneur comes out and is ready for a new challenge.

My Objective Changed

Yes, it’s a lot but this is what I signed up for. I’m excited about this and looking forward to pursuing this new career and path I’m on now. Will it be scary yes, it already is haha? People are buying my book and reading about me that’s still an adjustment. I have always been a private person and always kept to myself. Now I went the complete opposite direction and wrote a book about my dyslexic world.

This started out as a journal and sharing my faults and weaknesses with my dyslexia and how much I have struggled over the years. But then as I was writing it transitioned into wanting to help kids and young adults like myself.

I don’t want to sell books for a living. I want to sell my unique life and what I have learned along the way and how I see the world. Now I’m not saying my views are all correct and you have to follow me or you will lose and fail. That’s not it at all obviously.

You Never Know

All I’m trying to share with the world and YOU. I know what it’s like to be confused, feeling alone and searching for meaning in life. I always believed I was different and meant for something special from a young age I just never knew what that was. Now I think I found it. To share my dyslexic story with those that are like me and searching for meaning and purpose.

It took me 298 hours to finish this book. It was worth every minute typing on my computer. When I was writing and bringing this book to life it gave me a purpose in life. It helped me feel alive for the first time in a long time. That’s why my story is so unique.

Who would have thought a dyslexic kid would want to and could read 50 books in almost five years and finished writing three books, published one and now starting his fourth book? That’s why life is so precious. You never know where you might end up in the world. Never stop fighting and never give up on your dream and passion.

The World Through My Dyslexic Eyes

It’s Finally Here

Well, I have good news people. After four plus years and almost 300 hours spent working on my book. I’m happy to announce for the first time The World Through My Dyslexic Eyes is officially live and is now on Amazon. Links are below.

I would be lying if I didn’t say this felt weird but it does haha. I can now say Peter A Harrower is a published author. I can’t help but smile, I still can’t believe this happened. Thinking back to four years ago when I started this book. Wow, that would be cool if this actually gets published and becomes real and not just talk about it and hopefully become real one day.

A Long Time

Well, I did it and I cannot be more excited to announce that my number one goal for almost eight years now has come true. I’m able to call myself an author now. The point of this was not to become an author and fill my own pockets. The point of this was to share my story and what I have gone through over the years. My unique story is way bigger than any dollar amount. My story is unique and a one of a kind just like your story.

I know how hard it was dealing every day with my faults and weaknesses every day of my life. I mean I still struggle with them and I always will struggle with them. Finally, I found a way to fight back for the first time in my life. Instead of running from what I suck at now, I’m now embracing what I suck at and now sharing that with the world.

New Me

This book is way more than just a journal and sharing what I have learned over the years. This book is hopefully going to make a kid with dyslexia or battling whatever problems they have currently. It’s going to let them know that its ok to be afraid and scared to do the things you’re not good at. I’ll be honest I’m still scared to read in front of people to this day at 28. I’ll probably never be a fan of that.

I hated reading and writing all the way up to graduating from high school. Then it hit me a couple years later. Why not try and turn that weakness into a strength or at least try and become a little better? That’s what I did and that’s what I’m still doing and will always be doing. 49 books read in the last four and a half years. Three books were written and now finished in the last seven years and more ideas in the back of my mind waiting to be shared with the world.

My goal is to read 100 books by the time I’m 30. I have about 15 months left. Isn’t that funny how people can change? In my past, you couldn’t pay me to read. Now my new goal is to finish 51 books in the next 15 months haha.

Focus On You

My biggest goal for this book is to help that kid or 21 year old whatever the age. I want them to know that its ok if they don’t know what they want to do in life or what their career is yet. Yes, they might get upset seeing their friends finding their way and career in life but who cares. Yes, it might suck because they found it and you didn’t but it doesn’t matter. They have their own life and you have yours. It took me a long time to realize that and actually start believing it.

You just need to focus on your life and what you want to do and what you enjoy. Life is short and life is so precious, we only get one chance at it. It’s not a game where you get unlimited chances to beat that level. When you’re called home and it’s time for you to go there are no do-overs. What you did and put in up to this point is what you get out of it and that’s it.

Vision

That’s why now is the time to make the most of your life and don’t look back. When you’re on your death bed you know what should scare you and be one of the scariest things to see around your bed or in your mind? Is all the thought bubbles of I wish I did this or that? If only I had more time or could do it all over again. That is one of the scariest visions I have ever had in my life.

That vision is what drives me to make the most of my life now. Well, a lot of things drive me to make the most of it haha. God put me on earth and in this situation for a reason. I was blessed with the strengths and weaknesses for a reason. Now is the time to make the most of your life and live it up with no regrets why you can.

Go write that book and publish it in 2019. Go run that race or climb that mountain. It doesn’t matter what it is. We all have our own unique hills to climb in our life. I’m 28 and I just got over my first big hill in my life. That hill was finally publishing my book.

What’s Next

Now looking out at the beautiful view in front of me. Do you want to know what I see on my horizon? I see opportunity in front of me. Yes, there are hundreds of hills I need to climb still to keep going and there will always be hard times ahead. But that’s what I want, I don’t want a flat easy walk to my deathbed. I want to see the world and share the world with you and with my wife. That’s why now is the time to make the most of it and chase those dreams and goals you have in your life and make them a reality.

Here are the links to my book below. I hope you enjoy.

Kindle

 

 

 

 

Paperback