Aim High or Aim Low

Aim High or Aim Low

The Struggle Begins

I was listening to someone on Peptalk the other day. They talked about hitting goals. I would rather aim high and miss a goal and come a little short. Then aim low and hit a small goal and wonder what’s next? That’s what our life should be. That’s what my life has been building up to all of these years.

From ages 6-25 I was building my foundation and building who Peter is meant to become. It wasn’t always pretty, but I was doing the grunt work. For years and years, I hated myself, I still struggle with this. What could I really accomplish? How can I make a difference in the world? I always wondered and prayed about helping others somehow and making a difference, I just didn’t know how to.

I Couldn’t Stop

For years I was going back and forth, no I can’t accomplish anything. I’m just a mistake and I was the one oops that slipped by in the world. Wondering all of the years, why God gave me this disability and put all of this on my shoulders?

One day it hit me, I was reading a book about Tupac Shakur. He was talking about journaling and poems. I always thought journaling was for kids or something. Well if Pac is doing it, what do I have to lose haha?

I was journaling for a few weeks. Then one day something just clicked. Why don’t I do something with this, why don’t I create something from scratch? With no idea where to begin and what to do, and how to write a book. I did what you’re supposed to do in the beginning, I would write and write some more.

Aiming High

Shortly after writing for a while, this passion began to grow and take over. I now feel a purpose for the first time, I feel free now when I write. As stupid as it sounds, I was happy. How could something I hated in school so much make me feel so happy now? For starters, this attribute that I have never been good at before was not being forced on me now like it once was. My dyslexic mind and creative side of me took over and took off. I went all in, and 0-60 and writing as much as I could.

That’s when everything started to fall into place. I Peter Alexander Harrower am going to publish a book and become an author. My books are going to be turned into movies. More importantly, I want to help people just like me, especially kids. I think I need to share my story with the world and let them know what I’m trying to do.

Self Doubt

When I first thought all of this, of course, I was thinking I’m losing my mind. How can this stupid kid who’s only 21 think he’s going to enter this field? Who would want to read his books? I can’t write, I can’t spell, or read fast or even enjoy reading for that matter? What kind of author has those faults and burdens weighing them down? I’ll tell you the kind of author that has those faults, that author is ME.

I was comparing myself to the best of the best. Looking at their background and what they went on to create and share with the world. What makes me different than every other author before me? Who cares what all of the other authors are saying and thinking. I’m not doing this for their praise or approval. I’m doing this because writing has given me more in life then I can ever give it back. Writing has brought meaning and passion to my life, more so than I ever could have imagined. Writing is giving me a way to share my story with you. I know I’m only begging and I haven’t done anything with my books yet.

Rolling The Dice

There’s a real possibility that my books and blog won’t live up to the potential that I think they could reach. If that turns out to be true, well that would suck. But I know at the end of my journey when it’s my time to go home. I know first-hand, that the goals I set out to reach and try and accomplish. The material I was trying to give to the world and help and entertain as many people as possible. If it turns out writing isn’t the career for me well then, I gave it my best shot.

I’m 28 at this very moment, and I know my writing and life goals are very high right now. To be honest, my goas scare the crap out of me. They are so big that when I start to talk about them and share what my goals are with writing. Sometimes I get embarrassed and think, wow these are big goals. You know what that’s the point of goals, they should be high and give you something to reach for. They should make you uncomfortable, that way they are taking you out of your comfort zone. Because what kind of life is it if you’re only living in your comfort zone?

Keep Flying

When I started writing for the first time in my journal. August 6, 2011, I said to myself. Peter one day you’re going to publish this book and be able to call yourself an author. How cool is that? Here I am getting goosebumps as I’m writing this and thinking back to that summer day as I was writing the first page in my notebook.

Life is short, it’s about time we all start living it up. It’s about time we all start getting uncomfortable and taking a risk and going after something we love and want in life. Set those big scary goals, and embrace who you are. Who knows what you’re capable of doing? The only way to find out is taking that first step in that direction. From there you take another step, and another and keep going no matter what.

Screaming With Passion

Screaming With Passion

Seven Years Ago

What started out as a hobby, quickly turned into an obsession. Once I started moving that pencil in my notebook all of those years ago, it was like I never stopped. That passion has only grown over the years. I have never felt more focused, and more determined and passionate before in my life.

“I feel his hand on my brain, when I write rhymes I go blind and let the Lord do his thing” – 2Pac

When I first started writing this was me, minus the rhymes and replace that with writing haha. I just got in the zone and focus on what I’m doing and shut out the world and everything around me. It’s me and my writing and that’s all I see at that moment.

It Begins

It was probably a few days after I started writing my first book. I was just messing around, not sure what to do. Then it hit me, I’m going to write a book. Laughing about it at the moment, I have no clue how to do that? Where do you even begin? More importantly, can a 21-year-old dyslexic kid with a learning disability who hated reading and writing at the time write a book? The answer is yes, why not?

Just because I read slow, I suck at spelling and overall did horrible in school. That doesn’t mean I don’t have good ideas or have the potential to come up with something a little different. My whole life up to this point has been unique, a little different and definitely out there. It’s because I’m not like most people, just like you’re not like most people. I quickly realized once I started to fill those lines with words. I have the power to create something and bring a story to life. How awesome is that?

My Excitement

It was the third date, and it was going to be a 40-minute wait at Lockleys. In that time, I told Lindsay about all three of my books. I talked about my fiction series and what I’m going to do with the three books and turn them into movies. Long story short, what she said about my passion and writing made me feel a little better and a little more confident in my writing.

“Hearing you explain the details of your novels was such a touching moment. I could have listened to you talk about your stories for hours. I’ll never forget how your face lit up and you were full of passion. I could sense the passion and zeal for writing and how creative your mind and heart were. It’s a beautiful thing seeing someone’s spirit come alive when you know they are living the passion or dream that God placed inside of them. I don’t have a passion for writing, but your excitement pulled me in and I wanted to know more”.

Possessed For Writing

Yes, this is my girlfriend that said this haha. At the time this was our third date. When I was telling her about my books. I wasn’t trying to show off and brag about what I’m trying to do or anything like that. It was the complete opposite. I was very nervous about telling her what I wanted to do. What if she doesn’t get a good vibe from what I’m trying to do and share with the world? I really like her, but if she can’t see what I see then maybe this won’t work. I hope she understands, I’m not taking this lightly and messing around and what I’m talking about in my books.

This is not a joking matter for me when it comes to my writing. I’m serious, this goes way beyond just a hobby now. I think after writing the first page of my book all those years ago. This hobby quickly died, and I became possessed with writing.

The World Through Your Eyes

Will everyone feel the same way my family or Lindsay feels, probably not? I’m not expecting everyone to love my writing, and what I’m trying to do. I’m, sure there will be a lot of people that aren’t impressed or could care less about what I’m trying to share and do. I don’t care, that’s their opinion. I’m trying to reach those that are looking at the world a little different. That dyslexic kid, or the outsiders that feel alone and scared. You’re the people and kids I’m trying to talk to. You’re the reason and my passion for wanting to get better every day and not quit.

I would be lying if I never thought crap, it’s been seven years I still haven’t published a book yet. I don’t think this is ever going to happen. Honestly, who knows, maybe I won’t be on the shelf with the best of the best. Who cares, I don’t just want to be remembered for my writing. I want to use my writing as a foot in the door to be able to share my story with the world. I’m not better than anyone of you out there. But I believe my passion and my unique story through my eyes, might be beneficial for some people to hear.

What’s Your Passion

That’s why passion should be important to you. If you don’t have a passion for something, then you need to reevaluate what you’re doing? I wasted too much time in my life just going with the flow and being a zombie in this beautiful world that we live in. I have wasted far too many days depressed and pissed off at the world and myself.

What’s your passion in life? If you can say you have no idea or you’re not sure, well that should scare you. We all have a purpose in life and are all meant for something special. It’s time to recognize where you are in your life. If you’re not happy with where you are, then maybe it’s about time you do something about it?

Your Gift To The World

Your Gift To The World

Do You Know

What’s your gift to the world? Maybe at this very moment, it’s hard to believe you really have anything positive to share with the world. What can I give the world? I’m a bum, I suck at school, I’m not that smart I can’t read well. I have no degree next to my name. When I look at my resume what do I see? A variety of jobs over my life, some lasting longer than others. Realizing every few years in my life I get in a funk, it seems like I need something different in my life. Maybe I’m not in a funk, maybe the jobs I had at the time were just another step in moving in my direction.

Everything happens for a purpose, and everything that happened to me in my past brought me to this very moment for a reason. For years and years, I thought Peter was going to end up just being a pawn in life. What can I really do? I’m athletic and picked up sports very easily. I like to think I’m funny and can make people laugh. School was hell for me, I can be very sarcastic. I have anger issues, my disability still haunts me and hangs over me to this day.

In the end, I think I have a good heart, and I like to make people happy. I don’t like seeing people angry and down, because I was in a bad place and at a low on and off for most of my life. I clearly know what kind of toll that can take on a person, and how heavy of a burden that can be.

Never Stop Moving Forward

That’s why I think writing and sharing my story was placed in my heart. Just like trying to help people and make them happy in life. That’s why I think my writing is going to have an impact on people. I know first-hand what you’re going through at this very moment.

It’s not easy, in case you haven’t noticed life can be hard. Life can keep you down if you stop fighting back. I was waving the white flag and with no care in the world for far too long. Finally, it hit me, maybe all of this was just all a part of my story and what I’m supposed to share in my future?

My Gift

Now I truly believe this will be my gift back to the world. Will I go on and sell millions of copies and have some of my books be turned into movies. Part of me want’s to say yes and I hope so, I won’t lie about that. I truly think they can bring entertainment to others in the world, and that’s the goal. I want to make people happy and show them a different view and approach to life that maybe they didn’t see before. Am I trying to force something on to them or my views, no of course not? I’m just showing them one example of how someone sees the world through his eyes. That’s what’s beautiful about this, all of our stories see the world differently every day.  

Overall my priorities are to share my story with anyone and everyone that want’s to listen. Yes, you read about my goals with selling millions of copies in my fiction series I’m working on. Then maybe those books being turned into movies. I’ll be honest those three books is something fun I’m working on and testing my creativity. Hopefully, that’s where I make some of my money back.

Never Say Never

I’m not writing my memoir and my blog, for the fame and money. My blog is just another location to reach people and another source for people to understand who the real Peter is. My book and blog are for people and kids, that have a disability or ever felt like me. Have you ever felt alone, angry, scared of what’s next and searching for direction and purpose? That’s the audience I’m trying to reach with my blog and memoir. It’s not about dollars sold from my books. It’s about the people buying those books that I’m talking to.

Looking back at my early life, I never thought I would be trying to enter this field. I also never thought I would still be living at this point. Like I said, I was in a dark place for a long time. Now here I am, and for good. Do I have everything figured out and a book deal to help share my story? No, that’s life we will never have everything figured out. No, I don’t have a book deal, I had 105 rejections from agents rejecting my books.

Share Your Gift

Having those rejections, well that sucked I won’t lie haha. You can’t give up. I found a different approach now and taking a different path to my end goal of becoming a published author. I looked myself in the mirror and thought hundreds of times, maybe even thousands of times. Calling myself names that I’m not going to repeat here. I hated myself for years. I still struggle with that to this day. Through it all, I firmly believe this was placed in my heart for a reason. That’s why I’m so determined to make this dream and project of mine a reality.

From a young age, I knew I was different and was always meant for something bigger. I just didn’t know what that was. Now I know what it is. As much as writing brings me joy and makes me feel free and happy. I’m doing it for you just as much as I’m doing it for me. I’m stubborn and I can’t quit now, it doesn’t matter how many rejections I receive. This stubborn dyslexic kid is determined to enter a field that he never imagined of being in. I’m determined to share my story and passion I have towards life and what I want to accomplish.

I Took The Road Less Traveled

I Took The Road Less Traveled

The Road Less Traveled

There are two roads in front of you, what do you do? Both roads are heading in opposite directions and look the exact same. In my mind, one road looks beautiful with the trees and the leaves around that road. That road leads in the direction of what the “normal” life is. Then there’s the other road going in a different direction. The road is cracked, branches are covering it, the trees are dead. Very few will actually go down that road. What road would you go down?

I’m not normal, I’m unique and different compared to most. Just like these two roads, they are completely different in every category. As much as I hated it when I was younger, I now except it at 28 years old. With no idea what to do with myself and no idea where to head next.

Screw it, I decided to take the road less traveled. I decide to go down the ugly road that not many are willing to travel down. That’s why from a young age, I see the world differently than most. Is my way better than others, of course not? This is just how I see my world through my eyes.

Left or Right

To some people, the decision might be hard deciding where to go and what to do next. For me, my mindset and poor attitude and views toward life already decided my outcome and life before I ever really started living. From age 6-25 going down the road that leads to the right was the first easy decision I ever made. School wasn’t for me, being a stupid dyslexic kid who can’t read and write. Anything that has to do with school, or believing in himself I Peter A Harrower suck at it. To this day, It’s still a battle.

Well if that’s the case, then what is for me? That’s the problem, I have no idea what’s for me, how do I figure that out? I think what I have learned over the years in trying to figure that riddle towards life out is, you actually have to live life and learn from it. You have to try different things in life, you have to experience and taste different adventures. You might fail in some things, and sometimes you might win.

I’m Not Like Most People

Most people head left and know exactly what they are doing and live a happy and awesome life. With all due respect, I don’t care about the people that already figured out what road to take and are doing very well. I’m speaking to the people and kids, that are undecided and have no idea which direction to take. Those are the people I’m doing this for, those are the people I’m trying to reach with my books and blog. I know what it’s like first hand to be upset and confused. Going back and forth searching and failing for which direction to go in.

At 28 and a late bloomer, I don’t love admitting that but it’s true. I’m only starting to figure out what I want to do in my life. It was a bumpy ride getting to this point, and it definitely wasn’t easy. I believe writing is going to lead me to my success. Now when I say success, I don’t just mean making money and trying to become wealthy. To me, money isn’t even a top priory at this moment.

Creating Something

For years I was slowly building my foundation in life and didn’t even know it. Within the last few years is when I really started to notice progress. I have never been so excited for what’s ahead of me and what the future holds for me. Sure, the unknown terrifies me sometimes. It’s hard not going back to my old ways and thinking, crap what if writing doesn’t work out? Now I truly believe 100% that it will work out, I might not sell millions of copies. The point I’m trying to make is not about the copies of books I’m trying to sell. It’s about the people buying those copies. Those are the people I’m trying to connect with.

Every book of mine that is purchased through the years. If I just look at it with a dollar sign on it then I have failed. That’s not why I got into writing seven years ago. The reason I got into writing is when I write it make’s me feel free and alive. Whenever I start typing, and I’m in my zone and trying to bring a story alive. In my early years, that’s one of the few times I was happy in life. Writing gave me purpose and hope towards something bigger in life.

Just Be You

I will always have my personal issues, and it will continue to be a working progress. Living with this negative and angry mindset towards the world for 22 years is not going to be an overnight fix. It will take time, and I’m starting to notice some change already. That’s why I’m doing this, I know what life is like with that dark cloud over your head.

Now I’m trying to help remove those burdens from other people. Deep down were all winners and we can all be successful in life. You just need to look deep inside of you and find it. That’s what I’m trying to do is to help you find it yourself, I can’t do it for you.

When you’re stuck and looking at two different choices in front of you. Don’t be afraid to take the one less traveled. Don’t be ashamed of who you are and where you think that road might take you. My road has opened me up to a whole new word I would never have pictured in my life. Don’t be afraid to go the other way, embrace it. Besides if you don’t take that chance. You never know how beautiful that road might be a hundred yards into that path and your life.

I Took The Road Less Traveled

Risk Or Regret

What To Do

What is worse, the pain of risk or regret? Now I’m no expert, but I think the answer should be obvious. Now just because it’s obvious, doesn’t always mean it’s the easiest answer to make. Some decisions are hard to make, some are a no-brainer.

Knowing when to make the tuff call, and take a leap of faith. That’s what I did a year ago, and still working on to this day. I’m pursuing something that for a long time, I didn’t think I had any business being a part of. But deep down in my gut, I had a feeling and it was the only decision to make. Last year I stepped down from a full-time position to part-time. I wanted more time to try and pursue a writing career. Was it risky and scary absolutely, but deep down I know it was the right decision?

Take Action

Peter Harrower, was diagnosed with a Learning Disability and Dyslexia at the young age of six years old. From age 6-25 it has been a constant roller coaster in my life. Some days I was happy and high and loving life. On the other hand, and most days, I was as low as you can almost be. Hatting myself and who I was with this stupid disability. Feeling bad for myself and hating who I was, depressed and just miserable. With no care in the world for a long time, confused and lost going through life like a zombie.

Finally, when I was at my lowest and didn’t, think I could get any lower. Just four short months after my 25th birthday I ran into a brick wall. Not physically because that would really hurt haha. Well maybe that would have been easier and that would have woken me up faster haha. Mentally and in life, I just hit a brick wall.

I’m Determined

It was time for a change, and fast. I decided to make that change and never look back, well not entirely. I look back occasionally to see how far I have come and to remind myself of who I used to be and the kind of person I used to be. I’m a whole new person now and have been for the last three years. I started writing more, and that hot summer day in July was the first day of my new life. I committed to making a legitimate run at becoming an author. With no direction on how to do that, but I was going to do it.

From last January to this day as I’m writing this, I do not officially have anything published yet. But yet I consider myself an author. To be fair and you might not even know it or have ever thought about it but were all authors. Were all authors of our life, and every day is a new page going in our book. Now I know that’s cheesy, but it’s true. No matter where you are in your life. No matter what obstacle you might be going through or hill your climbing at the moment.

Sometimes You Never Know

Every morning is a fresh start and a new opportunity to start living again. That’s why I dropped down to pursue this career. Did I know it would work out, no of course not I still don’t know if it will or not? But I do know I don’t want any regrets by the time I take my last breath in life. I knew if I didn’t pursue this opportunity that would be the biggest regret in my life. The pain of the regret I would have had would have been much worse then the pain of risk if I didn’t do this and give it my all.

Now I have my own website and have been blogging for a few months. I have had over 2,400 visits on my blog and 677 people visited my website within that time. If you Google my name, peterharrower.com is the first link that comes up. When I made my blog, I was on page six on Google. Now I get it, I’m not a household name and its only page one for my name. It’s not like I’m the number one blog for Learning Disabilities, at least not yet.

I’m Focused

In the end, this is so much bigger than what I thought I could do and where I would be at this time. My books still aren’t published, I feel like I haven’t accomplished anything yet. That’s just me being a tuff critic, I know I’m only begging. Here’s the kicker, I know I have a lot more to improve and a lot farther to go. That’s only making me work harder and stay focused on the task at hand.

My focus is not to have Peter Harrower be a household name and have the number one blog about learning disabilities. The point of this is to help people and kids just like me. That’s why I knew I had to take the risk and go all in.

Don’t Give Up

Life is short and it’s a beautiful gift that we ALL take advantage of some days. Why I’m still breathing and have the opportunity I’m trying to turn my life around and have a positive impact on people. Will it be easy, of course not and I wouldn’t want it to be? It’s going to be hard, and a long and bumpy ride and I’m ok with that. Because I know my past was building me to go down this path at this very moment.

That’s why I’m going to risk it all now, so in my future when I’m old and sitting in my rocking chair I can look back. Whether it’s good or bad and I make it as an author or not. I will be proud of the effort I gave. I took a leap of faith closed my eyes and went for it. Besides, it might work out, and you might land softly on your feet.

Get Over That Hill

Get Over That Hill

Keep Climbing

If there’s a hill or an obstacle in front of you, climb it and get over that hill. If there’s a hurdle in front of you, jump over it. The point is to always keep working, no matter what happens to you. Sometimes, bad things happen. No matter where you are in your life, you need to always remember to keep working and never give up.

No matter what happens to you in your past, or is currently happening to you. Who knows what’s waiting for you down the road. For me, I can’t wait for you guys to read my book. The plan was to publish it at the beginning of the year, well that didn’t happen. Like I said, things don’t always go your way. Everything else is pretty much done, I’m just waiting for the editing to be done.

Different Approach

One good thing about it taking this long, well trying to think positive haha. I can start to focus more on my book series now until that’s done. To be fair, if that book was done and published then I wouldn’t have to worry about it anymore. The only thing I would have to worry about is telling people that I have this book out.

That’s life again things happen. In the meantime, all I can do is keep working and keep climbing that hill till I reach the top. There’s still a lot of ground for me to climb, till I can officially say I’m proud of myself and I finally made it. That will be a special day when I can finally say, Peter, I’m proud of you. With being a tough critic, especially to myself.

I’m Not Done

There is still a lot more I want to accomplish and a lot of people that I think need to hear my story. I don’t mean that in a conceded way, of course, that’s not my intentions. For a kid that HATED school with a passion. A kid who has a learning disability. I have thousands of bad memories in the back of my head. Different situations that this burden has left a bitter taste in my mouth over the years. I know first hand how hard it is to get through life with this on your shoulders.

There were days, I was scared to talk to people. I was embarrassed for who I am and how stupid and dumb I felt. Most of my early life negative thoughts were always in the back of my head. I don’t belong in this group of people, who am I compared to them? Look at what this person accomplished, and then there’s me? This is the kind of mindset and attitude I had going back at a young age and starting around 2nd grade. The only reason why I would tap myself on the back. Is because I know first hand what I went through every day for the last 22 years to get to this point in my life.

Dream Come True

Peter A. Harrower will one day be able to say that he is a published author. For once in his life, he committed to something and followed through with it. He entered a field that he never thought he belonged in. Will I be a big-time author and sell millions of copies, who knows that’s not my focus. Of course, that would be awesome but that’s not why I’m doing this. I don’t just want to be an author and write the rest of my life. I want writing to be what get’s my foot in the door. Writing makes me feel free and It takes me into a new world where I can do or be whatever I want.

More importantly, I want to be able to speak and connect with people just like me. I want to share The World Through My Dyslexic Eyes to every person that needs to hear it. Publishing that book is not just about letting the world know who I really am. It’s about letting the world know WHO, I really am and the kind of person I am and why I’m doing this. Letting them know, you never actually know what someone is going through or how hard they might have it. This book is for all of those kids that ever felt different, or alone, it doesn’t matter what the issue might be.

Never Stop

From a young age, I knew I was different and I hated that. All I ever wanted was to just fit in and be like everyone else. Now that I finally grew up, I’m glad I’m different. I’m not like everyone else, I’m far from normal, and I like that now. I personally think I was created for something bigger. That’s why I’m sharing my story and that’s why I can’t stop climbing that hill.

It doesn’t matter what’s in front of you or what’s blocking your path. What matters is you find a way to get over it, under it, or through it. Just keep going and don’t stop no matter what. One day it will all make sense and you will look back and smile and appreciate everything that happened.

Thank You

Having that killer instinct that no matter what I will finish this job and not quit. That’s why when I was climbing that hill, I didn’t know at the time but it wasn’t just me. As cliche as it sounds, I was fighting for and climbing that hill with you. I get that now, it’s all starting to make sense to me. All of you were right there with me, with every step I took. I just couldn’t see it at that moment but now I can. You all were with me then, I will be right there with you as your climbing your hill. That’s why I needed to share this book, nobody has a perfect life and were all unique in our own way.

Can You Give More Effort

Can You Give More Effort

Can You Do Better

What kind of effort do you give every day? Can you do better and give more effort? At the end of the night can you truly say you gave it you’re all? For me, I don’t think I can, some days yes. Most days, I know I could have done better. Granted I’m a tough critic, and always hard on myself, a bad habit I know.

For me going all the way back to when I was a kid playing sports in elementary school. I truly think I gave it my all and did the best I could in games. Maybe I could have worked a little harder in practices, but I was a kid I got distracted and playing with my friends what can you do haha. As far as games, I truly think I gave it my all and left it all on the court or field.

My Tunnel Vision

Paying attention in sports and focusing on those tasks always seemed easy to me. When It came to school and effort and giving it my all or doing my best, well I didn’t really have a best. Yes, I know I had my disability and handicaps you could say. I still didn’t try all that hard. Those burdens that were resting on my shoulders from a young age, were an easy excuse to use. I rode that pity train all the way through school and leading up to graduation. I’m not proud of that and with the actions I did, but I was distracted and focused on the end prize graduating.

All I wanted to do was graduate so I could be done with school and move on to the next thing in my life, and move on to what Peter was destined to do and fulfill my “purpose”. But there was one problem, what’s my purpose? How do you find it? What if I had it, and then missed my opportunity and it’s gone forever, now what do I do? That’s what I was thinking about once I finally graduated. Once I received my “piece of paper” that I was so focused on about receiving and working towards, it then hit me. Now what Peter?

Time For A Change

Peter Alexander Harrower was destined to be another role player coming off the bench. I was just a confused little pawn in life with a dark cloud over my head, weighing me down. I used every excuse I could find to try and feel bad for myself. Pitying myself, seemed like an easy thing to do. Now, what good can come from that?

That’s how I looked at my life and how I viewed the world in front of me. I didn’t care anymore, I hardly tried when it called for it. Then one-day reality smacked me in my face and I woke up from this coma I was in.

I can either keep feeling bad for myself or do something about it. So, I decided to do something about it. I took my writing to the next level, and everything else slowly behind it. I started taking life seriously for once, granted it took me 25 years to get to that point, but I finally found purpose and meaning in my life for once.

New Me

The last three years have been the best three years of my life. Sure, there were ups and downs at that time, but that’s life things happen. Through it all, I deiced to keep living and keep working hard every day and stop trying to feel bad for myself and stop making up excuses. It was time for a change, once and for all, I had to do something about it.

If I wanted my goals to become a reality and I wanted to enter a field that I NEVER thought I could be in, then I had to change a few things. I started reading more, I started writing more and working on my craft every day and every chance I could.

Time To Work

I couldn’t tell you how many times I was invited out to hang out with friends or go get a beer with some people. Not tonight I have plans, is how I responded. I’m working on my book and working on the next chapter were my plans, and I was ok with that.

I wasted far too many years not caring and not working hard to make something of myself. I had a lot of ground to makeup and a lot of work to do. If I want to become a published author I need to keep writing and keep learning from those that did it ahead of me. If I want to share my story with the world, then I need to stop talking about it and start doing something about it. It was about time I shut up and stopped talking, and let my actions talk for me.

Now Is The Time

Maybe you’re not where you want to be in life, or where you thought you would be at this moment in your life. That’s ok, sometimes that’s all a part of the journey, just look at my life as an example. I think my early struggles helped build me into the person I was meant to become at 28. So, I have no regrets about my effort, because the choices I made in my past good or bad. Is helping push me to make better choices and keeping me hungry enough to keep working hard now why I can.

That’s why I’m so focused, it’s not for the fame or the money. I’m a private person and an introvert at heart. I just finally realized that this was placed in my heart for a reason. If I don’t do anything about it or share what I have to share. Then I believe that is a tremendous opportunity wasted and a shame. If you’re feeling the same way, then maybe you should stop putting off what you have been dreaming about for so long.